Cowardice is a character trait that is laid in childhood. It is a constant, not temporary. Assumes lack of will, cowardice, inability to independently make decisions for their own good.
Today you can often find the concept of "faint-hearted" in relation to this or that person. Sometimes they say this about people who do not know how to empathize, have a low level of empathy. In fact, we are talking about a character trait, manifested in instability, susceptibility to someone else's influence, cowardice. A faint-hearted person is afraid to take responsibility for his actions, is in constant doubt.
Roots and formation
This character trait begins to form during childhood. Therefore, her progress is influenced by her parents, a little later - by her classmates, teachers. Usually, in the process of upbringing in such families, they do not teach children to be strong, but show how to adapt to the wishes of the child to the detriment of themselves. In this case, the true "I" disappears, if the child does not have the right to vote in the family. For example, if he is deprived of the opportunity to choose a favorite activity or circle of friends.
The character trait also develops in families where impunity and violence reign. In such conditions, there is a loss of life guidelines, the experience of one's own powerlessness against the outside world is gained. The child learns only a model of adjustment, which allows him to survive in a hostile environment.
Sometimes cowardice develops actively in high school, when there is a clarification and definition of leaders. If a person is weak, he quickly understands that any conflict is unsafe. This leads to the fact that obedience is externally manifested, and if it is possible to act covertly, opposite actions are possible.
Cowardice in life
It is not temporary, since it becomes a feature of the psyche. Therefore, one can speak of a person's cowardice only if lack of will and insecurity are constant. If such personality traits appeared suddenly, depression or severe emotional shock may develop, which inhibit willpower as a protective mechanism.
The signs are clearly manifested in adolescents. Between the ages of 12 and 16, children are highly influenced by those around them. Therefore, the future future depends on the company of friends. Because of cowardice, teenagers begin to smoke, "indulge" in alcohol and drugs. They don't want to lose the respect of their peers.
In adulthood, it is easy to notice a person with such a character trait:
- The faint-hearted will never argue, even if he has weighty arguments.
- Such people always have anger, envy or hatred, that is, the root causes of the development of character traits.
- It is difficult to hear his personal opinion from a person. It can also be due to cowardice.
Some authors say that stinginess is also a trait. It is associated with fear, for example, that the debt will not be returned, and alms - will cause poverty.
Cowardice in real life does not mean maladjustment. Among such people there are splendid performers, opportunists. However, without correction and psychological help, sometimes cunning and pathological lies of such a level develop that even the closest ones cannot recognize them.
Cowardice and lack of will
Faint-heartedness is a characteristic of weak-willed behavior. Some people refer to these two properties as suggestibility and negativism. KN Kornilov refers to the latter as an unreasonable tendency to act contrary to other people. Suggestibility is a lack of will, since the subject cannot be critical of what he is being asked to do.
The relationship between these two concepts was also found by K. K. Platonov and G. G. Golubev. They said that personality traits arise if the subject is dominated by motives that do not correspond to the overall goal of the activity. In their opinion, lack of will always manifests itself when, when assessing the situation, preference is given to the motive “I want to”. As with lack of will, the beliefs of a faint-hearted person change with the situation or circumstances. Such individuals do not have deep convictions.
What is the sin of cowardice?
The concept is also elucidated from the point of view of the Orthodox Church. In this case, we are talking about the "weakness of the soul" associated with pride. In religion, cowardice is also associated with pleasing people. The latter is understood as the simplest action caused by an attempt to obtain a benefit. This is inner slavery.
According to some clergymen, the national problem is having few children. Parents try to protect their children, they wrap them up, protect them from communication with their peers, always protect them. In such an environment, a person grows up to be faint-hearted. In the future, one does not have to expect a feat from him, responsibility for his actions. Such people cannot become generous or protective of the weak.
The described property interferes with:
- create families;
- self-actualize;
- choose a hobby for your liking;
- create a circle of friends with common interests.
How to improve yourself?
If a person realizes the problem, understands the need to solve it, work on himself begins. As exposure to other people's influence and orientation to the desires of others becomes a major obstacle, it is necessary to develop self-esteem and increase self-esteem.
This can be done in different ways:
- Change the environment. If there are people nearby who take advantage of your weakness, refuse to communicate with them. Try to include in your circle of communication individuals who treat you positively, have achieved a lot in life.
- Refuse self-flagellation. Faint-hearted people often underestimate their abilities and positive aspects. You should start working on yourself by avoiding negative assessments of your personality and career.
- Avoid comparisons. Remember - each person is unique, while each has its own advantages and disadvantages. Try not to compare yourself to other people, a possible option is to analyze yourself before starting work and after.
- Listen to affirmations. They are understood as verbal formulas that create a positive attitude. An affirmation is formed in the present tense, for example, "I am a strong and strong-willed person", "I own my own life." These phrases should be repeated in the morning and at bedtime.
If cowardice came to you from childhood, then you can go in two ways. The first involves attending trainings and consultations with a psychologist. While you are looking for the best option, start by forgiving yourself. It will be easier to do this using a piece of paper. On one, write about your own emotions, fears, failures. On the second, write down what and how you forgive yourself. This experiment should be repeated regularly.
The following techniques can be used to combat faint-heartedness:
- Try to articulate your desires as often as possible;
- Take a pause if you receive a request in your address, this will allow you to listen to yourself and make the right decision;
- Make a to-do list for the day, gradually include in it the solution of problems that your hands did not reach before.
New skills will take a long time to develop, but working on your character is always a difficult process. Therefore, to gain a positive experience, notice even small victories. For clarity, they are written down on a piece of paper.
In conclusion, we note that cowardice is definitely worth fighting. If this is not done, then the consequences can be unpredictable. For example, if such a person occupies a high position, the consequences of the decision made can lead to tragedy. This property also interferes with everyday life. Because of their fears, people find it difficult to acquire true friends and families, and often fail when dealing with work issues. Don't be afraid to stand up for your rights and do things that cause fear.
