When it comes to non-resource, destructive personal habits, then they can be abandoned, but a volitional decision is not an assistant here. We can force ourselves not to follow the established habit as much as we want, but until the brain has formed the appropriate neural connections (thanks to neuroplasticity), the old habit will take its toll. In order for new neural connections to begin to form, and an old habit replaced by a new one or simply ceased to exist, in transformational coaching we use certain tools, some of which can be applied independently, in a self-coaching format.
Let's say you want to get rid of the habit of eating, invariably burying in parallel with your smartphone. Realizing that this is of no benefit to either digestion or assimilation of information, you decide: that's it, I stop. However, the will will not last long - after a while you will again find yourself having dinner with your phone. What can be done?
First of all, research your habit:
1. Imagine that the habit, your behavioral pattern is present inside you, inside your body, as if it were an integral part of you. Listen to your bodily sensations, where exactly do you feel that this part is located?
2. Select this part and remove it from the body, placing it in the space next to you.
3. Study it closely: how it looks visually, what it looks like, perhaps a metaphor for this part will come to mind, look at it and just notice if it makes sounds, if it has a smell, what kind of kinesthetic it has.
4. Pay attention to what feelings you have for this part, what you want to say to it.
5. Mentally rise up, so that you see yourself and this part from above, consider in all details how the interaction between you and the part looks like, is there anxiety, anger, tension between you and the part?
6. Now descend into the part, associate with it and, being inside it, explore it, allowing yourself to be “in its skin”. It is very important to understand what need a part has, what it lacks, what it wants to tell you. You will find that the part that represents your habit has a positive intention and needs you to see, hear that need, and engage in dialogue.
7. Again mentally rise up into the dissociated position and again consider how the interaction between you and the part now looks like, what has changed?
8. Come back to yourself and allow yourself to hear everything that the part has said to you, if you wish, you can answer it, thank it. Notice how she has changed. How does she look now? How do you feel about her?
9. Return the part in its transformed form back to the most suitable place for it in the body. How do you feel?
10. Take a few steps forward, based on this new sensation and imagine yourself in a situation where the established habit took place. Would you like to follow it again or there will be no more need for it?
With the help of this technique, your brain will begin to perceive in a new way what is associated with a personal habit, at the same time, you will cease to be hostile to it and will be able to stop eating in the most environmentally friendly way, bury your smartphone, and generally stop following unnecessary habits.
