Adolescence is very difficult. The body is undergoing a powerful hormonal change, which has a strong effect on the mood of the child. In addition, external changes destroy self-confidence. All this leads to a depressive state, and sometimes to aggression, which with or without splashes out on others.
Communication problems between adolescents - why they arise
Before you understand how you can help your child solve the problem of communication with peers, you need to determine the cause of the disagreement. Only by identifying it, it will be possible to choose the correct solution to the issue. And finding the origins of the conflict is sometimes very difficult. Because adolescent aggression is often driven by subjective rather than objective factors. For example, kind and sympathetic children become outcasts only because they do not want or cannot fight back their offenders. And adults need to help a teenager to adapt to society. Otherwise, it will lead to serious psychological problems, from which it will be difficult for him to get rid of even as an adult.
How to help your teen improve peer relationships
If a teenager says that he has problems communicating with his peers, this is already good. This means that he trusts adults, understands that they can help him. It is much worse when the child withdraws into himself, and the parents do not even know that he has some difficult situations. First of all, it is difficult for the teenager himself. He has no support either in a peer group or in a family. And this situation needs to be urgently corrected.
For a teenager to become frank, do not pressure him. I must say that you love him the way he is. That he is a welcome child and can count on support in any situation. Even if he is wrong, you will be on his side and try to help in resolving all conflict issues with peers. This does not mean at all that you have to call the acquaintances of the child and persuade them to be friends with him. The main task of having a frank conversation is to instill in the teenager self-confidence and the knowledge that his parents are always on his side. With such a baggage, he will become much more courageous in communicating with peers, learn to respond to offenders, and will not be ashamed of new acquaintances, which may well give rise to real friendship.
To make it easier for a teenager to improve relationships with classmates or friends from the yard, offer to organize a party at home. There can be any reason - successful completion of a quarter, new year, birthday, etc. Give your kids freedom. Once you've prepared your holiday treats, leave your home. Without adults, teens become more open minded. And your child, being on his territory, without parental supervision, will be able to show all his best qualities. Feeling like a master, he will become self-confident, and those around him will feel it. The attitude of acquaintances towards him will change, and these will only be positive changes. Such gatherings can be repeated several times to consolidate the result. Perhaps there will be a grand cleanup after them. But the low energy costs are worth helping the child adapt to the complex and sometimes aggressive adolescent society.
The main task of parents is to help the child become more open and self-confident. Then he will have less conflict situations with peers. A hobby or hobby of a teenager will help to cope with this task. If he loves sports, write him down to the section, if he draws beautifully, to an art school, if he sings and dances well, send him to a theater group. There, a teenager will meet people with similar hobbies, and will definitely find a common language with them. He will learn to communicate with diverse acquaintances, and it will become much easier for him to solve problems with peers.
Parents whose children had problems communicating with peers noted that most often they appeared when moving to a new school and moving to another area. It is at this moment that you need to be most attentive to the teenager. He may not admit that it is difficult for him, to hide his grievances. Therefore, it is very important to monitor his psychological state, to notice mood swings in order to come to the rescue in difficult times.
