Traditionally it was believed that the higher a person's IQ, that is, the level of intelligence, the greater success in life he is able to achieve. At present, the emphasis has shifted somewhat. Modern research shows that 80-90% of life success depends on another indicator - the level of emotional intelligence, or EQ.
What is EQ
As practice shows, people who demonstrate an average or even below average level of intelligence often achieve much greater heights in life than the recognized "smart people".
This is due, first of all, to the fact that not only the mind is important for achieving success, but also such qualities as the ability to communicate and cope with life's difficulties without losing optimism and presence of mind, the ability to understand oneself and one's desires, to be happy what you have, and without regret to part with what prevents you from moving on.
All this is not directly related to the intellectual sphere, but rather lies in the area of feelings and emotions. The combination of these qualities and abilities is called emotional intelligence. Modern science defines it as the ability to be aware of your emotions and be able to manage them.
How to develop emotional intelligence
Like any quality given to a person by nature, emotional intelligence can and should be developed. Of course, the "initial data" for all people are different: they depend on heredity, on upbringing and the style of family relations. The life experience of each individual is also important: if from childhood a person has to overcome difficulties, make decisions, then he turns out to be more capable of managing his emotional impulses.
But it is possible to develop your emotional intelligence by consciously approaching this process.
- First, you need to acknowledge that your emotional intelligence is not high enough. Tell yourself that sometimes your emotions let you down, and because of this, problems arise in relationships, with health, in a word, it interferes with living and enjoying life. So, it's time to deal with your emotions.
- The next step is to explore your emotionality. Try to write down which events triggered an emotional response in you, and which ones, for some time. Gradually, you will learn to be aware of the connection of your emotions with life situations, you will see your strengths and weaknesses.
- Develop your observation and intuition. Master the skill of "active listening": react to the speech of the interlocutor, clarify - this will help you learn to understand people better. Master the skills of reading the state of other people by facial expression, posture, gestures - this is an exciting and rewarding activity.
- Be aware of your emotions. Each time you experience this or that feeling, analyze what exactly you are feeling and for what reason. Learn to consciously evoke emotions - with practice, you will find that it is quite easy to do this.
- Every time, experiencing dissatisfaction and other negative feelings, start mentally looking for the pluses in this situation, give compelling reasons for the positive impact of this event on your life. Give each failure 10 reasons why you didn't succeed. This will teach you how to prevent negative feelings from getting the better of you.
