Philophobia is a strong, often on the verge of panic, fear of love. People with such fear are afraid to maintain a loving relationship based on mutual feelings, respect and trust. They only feel comfortable with partners who treat them rudely, dismissively, humiliate them, and even resort to physical violence. How to deal with philophobia?
Philophobia reasons
To defeat philophobia, you need to know its cause. Often the reason is unwillingness or fear to take responsibility for the fate of the person you love. Fear of love can also arise on the basis of a previous love that remained unrequited, or several unsuccessful romances. Then a person can convince himself that he is unattractive, doomed to loneliness. There are also cases when philophobia is a consequence of fears of losing freedom and independence.
To get rid of philophobia in such cases, you need to resort to self-hypnosis and increase your self-esteem. A person needs to convince himself: he has something to love, and he himself can make his partner happy. As for the loss of freedom, love relationships, of course, impose certain restrictions on partners, but it is quite possible to come to terms with this.
The main thing is not to dwell on your experiences or previous unsuccessful love experience. If you were unlucky before, this does not mean at all that it will always be so.
Philophobia often occurs also after the tragedy associated with love relationships. For example, one of the partners experienced a strong insult, betrayal by the other. Or the couple broke up after the death of their common child. In such cases, as a rule, the help of a qualified psychotherapist is needed to get rid of folophobia.
How to beat philophobia
A very common cause of philophobia is psychological trauma in childhood. For example, an impressionable child often witnessed violent scenes between parents. Or his father and mother divorced, and he was very upset about it, blaming one of them for what happened. Or a new parent came to a divorced family, with whom the child did not have a relationship.
In more rare cases, the cause of philophobia is childhood jealousy of the younger brother (sister), if, due to the appearance of a baby in the family, the parents began to pay much less attention and love to the older child.
All this can lead to the fact that a matured person, on a subconscious level, will have a fear of family life. Therefore, he in every possible way avoids love relationships that can lead to marriage. In these cases, a psychotherapist will also help. With a trusting relationship between the doctor and the patient, the likelihood of a cure for philophobia is very high - about 90%.
