From time immemorial, people have been asking the question: "How to be happy?" Today we will try to understand a little how happiness is formed.
There is such a concept - "General program". This is the so-called global fairy tale that develops in a person's head. And this tale very often predetermines everything that happens to a person. This fairy tale begins to form from childhood, on the sly. Then it acquires new details. Then the person corrects it himself. It can be radically changed, but someone does not change it at all, rather adjusting to this fairy tale.
It may very well be that you have heard about some of the settings of this "General tale". For example, the fairy tale "Lucky". The person with the fairy tale "Lucky" has nothing remarkable. Often, he does not have specific qualities or some kind of genius abilities. Just an ordinary person, sometimes an ordinary person, no special talents. But you're lucky! Why? How?
He himself cannot really explain, predict how all this will happen, but at the same time, where others enter a puddle, he will definitely pull out exactly the tickets that he needs. I came for an interview - they didn't take everyone, but they took him. Why is that?
It works like a self-fulfilling prophecy. A person believes that it will be so - and indeed everything is happening that way. From the outside it seems that he is just lucky, everything turns out by itself.
"Loser" - this is how you can call a person with a different general program "Misfortune". Remember the movie "Unlucky" starring Gerard Depardieu? Depardieu played the lucky one, and Pierre Richard was the unlucky one who constantly had some kind of setbacks. Got up on the bridge - the bridge went. I did something there - I lost my shoe. This is just an illustration of the general program "Misfortune".
These programs largely determine the fate of a person - whether a person will feel happy or unhappy in life.
How it works?
It is sad to realize this, but the main program inherent in our Western culture is "Minus Zero" (typical for "Losers"). If people with such a general program lack something or if they have lost something, as a rule, they actively experience it with a minus, i.e. experiencing negative emotions. I have a one-room apartment, but I want a three-room apartment - we suffer. Or the car broke down, lost the wallet - generally the end of the world.
Along with the fact that such people negatively experience losses or shortages, they are indifferent, evenly and quite calmly about what they have. “What we have we do not keep, having lost we crying” - this proverb is about such people.
By the way, almost many people have a right hand. And even the left one! Answer honestly, do you often get high in the morning because you have both hands? Dale Carnegie wrote in his book about how he walked and suffered from the fact that his boots rubbed his feet. He suffered until he saw a man without legs. He felt ashamed - he realized that he had something to rub! How happy he was!
We do not often remember that we have hands. Sometimes there are flashes - Hurray, there are hands! But there is also hearing, smell, touch, etc. If we imagine for a moment that we have lost something, for example, a leg - how much will you be willing to give to get it back? I think a lot. Possibly all the property we have. After all, property can be acquired, but you cannot sew a leg back. So we once - and miracles - have a leg! Only, unfortunately, not everyone is so happy about the presence of a leg, in comparison with how if they had their leg sewn back on. Paradox.
The saddest thing is that it is difficult to make a person with a minus-zero program happy.
Imagine that you have given a person all the riches, fulfilled all his desires and presented everything that he dreamed of. After a short burst of joy, he will quickly get used to it and begin to take it for granted. And then he will start looking for disadvantages altogether: you have to pay taxes, and my yacht is not the largest, and the pool is too small. And no matter what you give him, he will be dissatisfied with everything. This is the trouble with such a person - he cannot be happy by definition.
There is another Zero-Plus setting. It is more characteristic of people with an oriental mentality. They, in contrast to the first, perceive problems with a zero sign, i.e. calmly, neutral, as a fact. If something happened - it just needs to be corrected, it just needs to be done, what is there, in fact, to worry about.
My colleagues and I still remember the tsunami in Thailand. Remember? Hundreds of thousands of lives were lost, it was a very big trouble. Our Ministry of Emergency Situations and psychologists went there. So our psychologists needed help there. They didn't know what to do. A person comes, a Thai, whose family died, or all property was flooded. Psychologists approach him and say - well, let's work, you have grief. And the Thai answers - Woe? Give me an excavator - I need to clear the blockage. Psychologists say to him - Well, do not hold back the grief. Thais do not understand - what are you talking about? Will there be an excavator? Psychologists generally shrug their shoulders. They say - we do not understand, but what to work with? Thais have a different mindset. There is a problem - we need to solve it. The meaning of crying? At the same time, they very often rejoice for any reason and quite violently. Imagine a person who wakes up in the morning and says: “Thank God! Morning has come! Hello Sunshine . We in Russia call such freaks. Imagine he didn't drink, but he just rejoices in the sun.
If two people with different general programs start a business on equal terms, then a “minus-zero” person is less likely to achieve high results. Can you guess why? Due to the fact that in business there are all sorts of surprises, there are some non-standard situations that need to be addressed. The person "minus-zero" experiences a lot and hard and for a long time gets out of this pit.
And try to deprive a person with a general program "zero-plus" of something. Even if everything burned out, was taken away, arrested, and his hands were also cut off, he would think: well, I have legs, I continue to live, hello, honey!
Someone, having arms and legs, turns themselves into an invalid and does nothing in life. Others, being physically disabled, lead an interesting, fulfilling, active life. A striking example of a "zero-plus" person - Nick Vuychich - without arms and legs, but feels like a full-fledged person! He has a wonderful wife, his son was born, he is one of the richest people on the planet. He organized a team of assistants for himself, travels all over the world and inspires people to live happily, enjoy life. Nick Vujicic says: Disabled? And what is it - a disabled person? You can do something - do it and everything will be fine! As long as the head is attached to the body, everything is real!
Such people will always have everything in order, both with happiness and with business.
Friends, which of these settings will you choose for yourself?
