If a person says that he is lazy, do not believe him - he is lying. If someone is called a lazy person, he is slandered.
Some people, for their specific demeanor, have been compared to an animal called a sloth. What do we know about this inhabitant of the Amazon jungle? It is a major vegetarian and energy efficient. His diet requires a special set of bacteria in the digestive tract, which greatly affect the processes of life. Despite its impressive size, this animal is practically defenseless and can become the prey of birds of prey, therefore, camouflage unkempt wool and inactivity serve it well.
You no longer consider a sloth to be a slacker, but what about his two-legged comrades? They, too, are much more complicated than it seems.
Excessive bashfulness
Children's spontaneity is charming only in preschoolers. The older we get, the more obligations we assume and the more norms and restrictions we must follow. Failure to meet any of the standards of the ideal adult is presented as something obscene. In order not to become a laughingstock, not to be subjected to public condemnation, flaws should be hidden.
When a choice arises between admitting a "terrible flaw" and "laziness," people are more likely to agree to be judged for the latter. This is not good, because agreeing to bear the stigma of a lazy person closes the path to attempts to figure out whether a secret vice is far-fetched. Willingness to accept unfair accusations against you will not improve your relationship with loved ones.
What are people afraid of
The saddest variant of "laziness" is an attempt to hide the bad state of health from others. Most often, a person himself does not realize that it is time for him to see a doctor, since constant drowsiness and a feeling of heaviness in the muscles is a symptom of the disease. In this case, even attempts to "overcome laziness" are possible, which leads to overloads of an unhealthy organism and can be put to a hospital bed.
More often than not, the readiness to admit that they are a lazy person is demonstrated by people who are physically healthy, but pathologically frightened by the need to openly present their interests and approach to solving a number of issues. Not wanting to disturb their relatives, they accept criticism of the formal side of their behavior from them, without trying to defend their position in life. This is a dead-end path, because, getting used to derogatory characteristics, it will be difficult for them to regain trust and respect. Delaying sincere recognition of your true attitude to a number of issues will also not be beneficial - it is easier to argue with a person who respects your opinion than to try to explain something to someone who is used to seeing you as a spineless lazy person.
Boycott
What exactly is the person hiding when they agree with the offensive definition of "lazy"? This could be:
- Disagreeing with the goals pursued by relatives, friends, or work colleagues. It is difficult to directly state that you do not share their values, but taking an active part in activities that you consider unacceptable for yourself is also not a hunt. The "Italian strike" begins - our hero does not break away from the collective in ideological terms, but in principle refuses to contribute to the common work.
- Diffidence. The desire to receive support from loved ones is much stronger than the need to receive a kick. If others do not understand this, they try to push them to be active with insults, a person's self-esteem falls, he is simply afraid to take up work. They finish him off with the title of "lazy".
- The desire to first understand the issue, and then act. The constant pressure of society, which is waiting for results, gets bored, and a person is alienated from his family and friends. Lack of understanding of the individual style of work on their part causes aggression. Now insults are becoming the norm.
- The behavior described above is also possible for persons who are striking in their ability to work. If a person is not sure that his occupation will meet the approval of the collective, he begins to hide it. To the question: "What are you doing?" the answer is "Nothing". An inadequate reaction in the form of immediate labeling reinforces the desire to hide one's real life from ill-wishers.
- Manipulation. The title of "bad" often plays into the hands of its bearer. No one will demand from a pathological lazy person to participate in housekeeping, or in the performance of everyday affairs. Conscious refusal to perform daily work is associated with infantilism, which is the result of improper upbringing.
How to solve the problem
To begin with, we need to abandon the term "laziness" in principle and stop inventing offensive nicknames for loved ones whose behavior we are unhappy with.
To start a conversation with someone who already bears an unsightly nickname, you should make a direct statement that you are ready to listen to his arguments and do not agree with everything that is said about him. Trying to start an adult conversation is likely to create a desire to defend yourself against it. You cannot follow the victim's lead, an aggressive reaction to attention from loved ones means a crisis state of a person. He has already come to terms with his position in society and is afraid to change something. Complaints with obsessive repetition of the assertion that the person is really the bearer of the vice of which she is accused can serve the same purpose. You should not be intrusive, but make it clear that an imaginary lazy person will always find understanding and support from you, it's worth it.
For those who like to call themselves lazy, and sometimes sincerely believe in it, being afraid to confess their dissent, I suggest growing up. First, figure out what exactly does not suit you in the path that you are diligently pushed into. Formulate your goals, find a business that you are ready to do. Look for a partner. Not an assistant, since you can shift your responsibilities to him and return to a remote corner of the problem.
