The period of the appearance of the baby can be safely called a crisis for the whole family. At this time, relations between the spouses are being rebuilt. They are now not just husband and wife, but also father and mother. Acquiring a new status carries many difficulties.
Reassessing your own childhood
Almost always, when a child is born, a young mother overestimates her personality. She often analyzes the lives of her parents, especially mothers. Someone begins to understand them better, while others, on the contrary, blame them more for something. If a woman already in adulthood has some kind of childhood grievances against her own parent, then at the birth of her baby, her psychological state may worsen. Childhood injuries contribute to the fact that a young mother forms inadequate requirements for herself, expectations from her baby and husband. In most cases, the woman herself is not aware of her motives, even if they are clearly visible to others. For example, those who did not have enough attention from their parents in childhood begin to take care of their baby too much.
In such a situation, the psychologist will help the young mother to see herself from the outside, to realize the motives of her own behavior. And this will allow her to manage her life and raise her child rationally. After all, if a woman acts consciously, then she takes responsibility for the life of her baby, and not just "goes with the flow." Only in this way is she firmly and comfortably established in the status of "mother".
Finding a Conscious Parenting Model
Another aspect in which a psychologist will help a young mother figure out is the elimination of automatisms in relation to her child. It is very common for women who were physically punished in childhood to renounce hitting their child. But everything turns out to be not so simple. As soon as emotions go off scale, the hand itself gives the baby a slap on the head. Later, thinking over everything, the young mother realizes that she is doing wrong, begins to blame herself and promises not to do this anymore. Just a promise is not enough. The mechanisms laid in us by our parents are very strong. When emotions are at their maximum, they are automatically turned into action. To fix this, to find a new model of upbringing, a lot of psychological work is needed. Just reading books is not enough. It is necessary to regularly analyze with a psychologist all situations in which the mother does not manage to behave the way she wants. The specialist will also help relieve the feeling of guilt for your mistakes, which greatly facilitates the relationship with your own baby and yourself.
It is especially important to overcome undesirable automatic patterns of behavior of parents during periods of age-related crises of a child. It is then that children become difficult to educate and disobedient. The essence of age-related crises will be explained by a psychologist. After all, they are therefore called normative, because almost all children pass through them at certain age stages - this is about 3, 7 and 10 years old.
Overcoming postpartum depression
Not everyone succeeds in overcoming postpartum depression on their own, so a mother in this state may well turn to a psychotherapist. His third-party sober view of the situation will help you find ways to cope with your emotions. Also, the psychologist will provide the necessary support, which, unfortunately, not all young mothers from loved ones have. In addition, the reasons for postpartum depression are different for every woman, they can be covered both in her childhood and in her relationship with her mother or spouse.
For some women, a single visit to a psychologist is enough to relieve symptoms of depression immediately after childbirth. But in order to understand the deep mechanisms of its occurrence, you need a course of several meetings.
There are many other situations in which the help of a psychologist will greatly facilitate the life of a young mother. And if she is happy, then both her baby and her husband will also be very happy. You should not run problems before serious scandals and depressions. Perhaps one visit to a psychotherapist will resolve many issues and significantly improve the emotional state of a young mother.
