Young girls and boys often dream of meeting true love that would not hurt. When you do have to deal with real relationships, which sometimes bring great disappointment, the question arises of the existence of happy love.
Love in philosophy
Although philosophical ideas are sometimes difficult to apply to real life, you can try to understand love and the pain associated with it in this aspect. Russian thinker Vladimir Soloviev divided love into three types.
The first type is descending love: when one person is able to give more to another, to protect and preserve him. Such love manifests itself to a greater extent in parents for their children and is based on an unconscious feeling of pity.
The second type is the opposite of the first, and such love is called ascending - from children to parents. Children revere those who are stronger and smarter than them, and it is on this feeling that their love is based. And the third kind of love is equal. Equal love is more often characteristic of spouses. By the way, there is a hint in the Bible that the love between God and the people is exactly the same as that of spouses.
Theory in practice
But applying philosophical theory to real life is difficult. However, this division can provide an answer to the question of whether love is without pain.
Often there are couples in love who, instead of equal love, have an upward and downward interaction. This is more often expressed in leadership: in a love union there should be a leader and a follower. If it develops this way, then such love will most likely be happy, because one will feel responsibility for the other and will not be able to cause real pain, and the other, in turn, will admire every new act of the first.
If love is equal, then building relationships and not hurting your heart is somewhat more difficult. The union will be accompanied by an eternal struggle for leadership, and relationships without deep introspection and sincerity will lose support.
How to avoid pain
Respect for each other is the basis of trust and, therefore, love. Often, a person ceases to control himself and does not notice how he causes discomfort to his soul mate. That is why you need to talk more often and express dissatisfaction at once, and not accumulate dumps of ardent anger inside.
Betrayal is the most common source of pain. Betrayal can be betrayal or just a break in the relationship for another reason. To try to avoid such an outcome, you need to be open to the person, and you will notice how the person opens up in front of you. Do not neglect the inner world of your soul mate, as this is the most fragile thing she has. This will at least ensure pain-free happiness for the one you love.
In fact, you will clearly feel when you meet the person you want. Building a happy relationship is very difficult, if only because it can be difficult for people to agree on something. But if love is real, then you will definitely find a common language and will not experience the pain of loss.
