Habits are a big part of us. We can say that the person himself consists of useful, neutral and bad habits. So that they help, and not interfere with us, we will try to take them under control.
An integral part of every habit is its basic condition - pleasure. We enjoy drinking soda, reading the newspaper, taking a shower, lighting a cigarette, playing sports. It can be harmful, yes, but nice. The second condition is repeatability. It doesn't count once. And when repetitions bring times to automatism - we are already dealing with a "mature" habit.
Habitual benefits
Good habits like jogging in the morning, tidying up your desk before leaving the office, maintaining your posture, etc. may already be invisible to us, but how they work perfectly. In order for them to take care of us, we must take care of their availability.
The recipe is quite simple, but it takes patience to prepare it:
- Think about what habit you are missing. Answer yourself the question "why". Why would you waste time and effort on this? How can you benefit from this innovation? Is it worth it?
Give yourself a few months to fix the habit. Some of them take root earlier, and some later.
- Come up with a "carrot" for positive reinforcement. Actually, you don't need to invent anything. Don't you feel energized after a morning warm-up or lightness when you are guided by the rules of a healthy diet? Isn't it nice to you that you have managed everything that you have planned for the day? However, you can promise yourself that if you stick to your plan to get used to a new habit all week, you will have ice cream on the weekend (to the movies, to visit, fly to Paris, ride elephants …). This will give you additional incentive.
- Laziness will beg you: “Where are you, dear? Well, it's so good for us to bask in bed! " Well, if gingerbread doesn't work, you'll have to turn to willpower. And you can also add a "terrible" punishment to yourself. For example, twenty push-ups for every skip of your morning run.
“Sometimes you’ll just forget. Forgetting to take out the trash when going to work, forgetting to wash the plate immediately after you finish eating the oatmeal, and, of course, forget to do exercises. Therefore, be more prudent than your memory - create reminders on your phone, set alarms, write down, stick stickers like "sit up straight" and "suck in your stomach."
… and harm
Fighting bad habits is much more difficult than mastering good ones. And if this is not a habit, but a serious addiction, then simple everyday advice cannot be dispensed with. An alcoholic, for example, is unlikely to permanently tie up with such a "habit" without outside help, but it is quite possible to quit smoking and stop biting your nails. We do everything the other way around:
- Consider why you need to get rid of this habit? What will you get if you quit smoking? Do you really need it?
- Try to answer the question, what benefits do you get from smoking (tossing a sock near the couch, putting it off for later). There is definitely something in this that warms your soul. In the same cigarette, in addition to the terrible smell and harm to health, there is a short pause, a respite, a stop for concentration of thoughts, a replacement for a snack, a return to infancy, in which mother's breast or nipple helped so much to calm down and feel safe … Something we carried away. But we clearly got a short list of what may be behind a bad habit. Look for your "benefits" and work to replace sources of calm and relaxation.
- Just stop doing what spoils your life. You can also use punishments and reminders, and, of course, rewards. How nice it is to celebrate the victory over your enemy every week.
Answers to the timely asked question "why" lead to the fact that we make a more informed choice. Before doing or not doing something, ask yourself why. But to begin with, this will also take some getting used to.
