Often times in life there are situations when you want to share your experiences with a loved one, friend, boss, or with a stranger who has had a strong influence. It happens that in this case the situation does not allow us to express our feelings or we do not know how to do it. What to do in this case? An example is also the situation of unrequited love, when there is no way to confess your feelings.
It so happens that it is simply impossible to express any feelings. We either know in advance that the other person will not accept them, or the situation makes a personal conversation on this topic simply meaningless. And there is a lot to express. It can be unspoken feelings towards a loved one, and resentment towards a friend, and aggression towards a boss.
However, there are ways that you can get the same or almost the same effect as having a personal, frank conversation with someone on topics that are relevant to you.
Mental conversation with a significant person, directed by a psychotherapist
You need to imagine the chosen person on a chair at a certain distance from yourself and start saying everything that you would like to say.
If you act in this way, then on some level you are actually communicating with the person and transmitting your emotions and feelings to him. Thinking about someone, you build an invisible emotional connection, which in this case will be used as a way to replace personal contact.
Do you remember the times when you just thought of someone, how this person called you after a few seconds? Or did you have anxious premonitions about someone, and later it really turned out that that person was in a difficult situation? This proves that the transfer of information is possible not only in person.
So, speaking out your feelings to the person whom you presented in front of you, you build an emotional connection and have the opportunity to express all your emotions. The psychotherapist in this case serves as an amplifier of this connection and helps to realize all the nuances of your experiences. It is in the presence of a third person that you can even feel how a significant person for you responds to what you say. At some point, it begins to feel how much he accepts, with what emotions he reacts, feels confused or inspired.
In many cases, if you have resolved many emotional contradictions in yourself, then the subsequent real meeting with this person will pleasantly surprise you, since the results of your work will appear in it.
Expressing your feelings in writing
If you do not have the opportunity to work with a therapist, you can do this process yourself. To do this, take a sheet of paper and, mentally addressing the person of your choice, write a letter about everything that you want to convey to him. Let it be utterly sincere. You can describe your negative feelings, and those expectations that may not have been met, and the hopes that you have. The main thing here is to constantly listen to your feelings and be in contact with yourself. It should be added that there is no need to send the letter.
After such a study of their feelings, the relationship changes for the better. You yourself begin to react differently: more balanced, with greater understanding and wisdom.
