Eye contact - they often talk about it, but they do not always specify what it is, how exactly you need to look at the interlocutor and how long to do it. It is not so easy to withstand a gaze, but it is also impossible not to look a person in the eye at all. There are a few rules to help you make eye contact, but not drill the person with your gaze.
What is eye contact
Eye contact is considered contact only if it really brings people closer, creates a certain "field of communication" between them, if you can call it that.
Sometimes you come across recommendations that if you want to create contact with the interlocutor, then resolutely look at the bridge of his nose, without looking away, and as closely as possible. Try not to blink yet, and the person will definitely decide that something is wrong with you. In fact, eye contact is not created that way; on the contrary, it only scares away.
Live contact is always based on naturalness. If you are interested in a person and like a conversation with him, then you will constantly look at him, if you are not embarrassed, of course. But a lively gaze constantly wanders a little: from the pupil to the pupil, sometimes a little to the side or to the lips, to the nose, and so on. Your interlocutor does the same if he is also interested in the conversation. You gaze intently into each other's eyes only at certain special moments of the conversation, the rest of the time only occasionally meeting your eyes. This is what is called eye contact, and not at all the continuous observation of a magic point in the bridge of the nose.
Of course, looking at the bridge of the nose is easier for those who are afraid to look openly in the eyes. But the simple way in this case does not work.
Features of eye contact
If on duty you often have to talk with people, you should be aware of some points, this will make your life easier. First, maintaining eye contact is considered desirable or even necessary only in European society. In the Asian tradition, on the other hand, it would be impolite. They look in the eyes, wanting to challenge a person, and also if you need to say something extremely special.
Secondly, during a conversation, the listener looks at the speaker, practically without taking his eyes off, and the one who speaks wanders a little. This is natural and most correct. Of course, the roles are constantly changing, but in general, this is the kind of contact you should strive for.
During eye contact, you can track facial expressions, the reaction of a person's eyes to your words, as well as what gestures the interlocutor has. This will give you additional information about him, but try not to think about it anymore, but to feel it. It's better to think about what your interlocutor says, and you yourself: after all, a conversation is, first of all, the formulation of thoughts. To do this, you need to try to focus as much as possible on the conversation you are having. Do not be distracted by interior items and other people, whose opinion or reaction during your conversation does not matter.
