A kind word, as you know, is pleasant to a cat. But what kind of word will it be? A genuine compliment or flattering remark from someone who doesn't really know you. Then you will think, what does this type really need?
Flattery, according to Ushakov's explanatory dictionary, is obsequious praise, hypocritical admiration for someone, for something, inspired by selfish motives. The key word is the word "selfish." And flattery is a formidable weapon in skillful hands, or rather on the lips? the girl whose attention they want to get; unloved relatives, for example, a mother-in-law, then she would not look so viciously at her son-in-law. The motives for flattery to this or to another person may be different, but they always pursue a specific goal: the approval of a strict parent, a possible promotion, or the opportunity to spend a good evening in the company of the most sought-after girl. It is believed that there are two main types of flattery: coarse and subtle. easy to identify. She is from the category of praises, like expressions: "the greatest of the greatest", "the most beautiful of the most beautiful", "Turkish delight of my heart." Listening to such flattery is not only harmful, but also often insulting. And sometimes it's just funny. If you know that you are not a model for television, then flattery in the style: “You should only be shown on TV” will seem silly and funny. The second type of flattery is more insidious. Subtle flattery - it is florid, and you still need to try to distinguish it from a sincere compliment. He is a flatterer required attentiveness, observation, quick wits and a sense of time. As well as complete control over your emotions. Otherwise, a seemingly sincere comment may turn into an evil mockery, and everything is lost. Flattery can also be humorous or sarcastic. If in the first case - this will most likely lead to fun, then in the second it may not end very well. Few people like sarcasm in their direction. There is also flattery on duty. Well, for example, as in the situation, “after all, everyone is flattering him in this spirit, and I must do the same.” And one more point that is worth knowing about flattery. Its focus. Most often, you send flattery at someone, but flattery to yourself is quite possible. It even comes in handy when self-esteem has dropped dramatically for some reason. The main thing in this case is not to overdo it and not turn into a narcissistic person, for whom the rest are a gray faceless mass, worthy of worshiping your beloved. In fact, if you believe the writers and classics, there is little worse than flattery. Therefore, it is better to focus on sincere compliments. They are honest, come from the heart and really give a person a sense of being appreciated.