The term "rudeness" was born thanks to Ham, the son of Noah. It means "rudeness, arrogance, inability to behave." Today, people are rude to each other on the Internet, using anonymity and impunity. Radio presenters are rude to the listeners who call the studio (this is even considered good form). Salesmen and managers are rude, representatives of all branches of government are rude to "mere mortals". It is necessary to clearly know how to respond to the offender, how to resist rudeness.
Instructions
Step 1
Constructive criticism. Rudeness should be separated from constructive criticism. Rudeness carries a negative charge, its purpose is to undermine self-esteem, destroy you psychologically. Constructive criticism has a completely different task: to make you better, to help correct mistakes. How to distinguish criticism from rudeness? Criticism can only come from the closest people who have lived near you for a long time, or people who are experts in the issue that the criticism concerns. Criticism is worth listening to. Companies pay huge sums of money to specialist consultants solely for the opportunity to receive criticism from them, while being rude is the prerogative of alien and incompetent people who are trying at your expense to increase their own self-esteem, status, importance in their own eyes and the eyes of others who witnessed their rudeness. Is it worth worrying about such "criticism"? But if rudeness is still "hooked", there are methods to resist its destructive impact. The most important thing is not to succumb to provocation and not start an argument with the boor.
Step 2
Ignore the boor. Ignoring is a powerful technique. A ham needs three things - audience, attention and feedback. Deprive him of attention and responsiveness. Skipping the boor's tirades on deaf ears, count the buttons on his clothes to distract him. Everything ugly said by a rude person will begin to relate to you only if you take it personally and undertake to argue, refute.
Step 3
Let the fog go. Some people just can't help answering the boor. If you are one of them, use the fogging technique. Having paraphrased the statement of the interlocutor, answer it with the most general phrase containing facts that cannot be disputed in any way. Consider an example. The pear seller shouts at you: "Why are you pawing my pears with your dirty hands?" Your answer: “Each person has their own way of checking the ripeness of fruit. You won't even have time to touch some of them, as they deteriorate. " Another captain-like phrase that fits the occasion is obvious: “Different qualities of goods imply differences in price.” The “clouding” approach involves creativity. Its essence is that the boor drove himself into a dead end, and you began to enjoy the verbal battle.
Step 4
Defend your boundaries. When rudeness "rolls over", you need to outline your own boundaries. Do it with phrases like "This is absolutely not my rules" or "This is contrary to my principles."
Step 5
Use counter questions. Ask questions on the merits of what the boor said. These could be questions like "Where did you get this information?" "Why do you think so?" "Why are you personally interested in this?" In the presence of an audience (and even without it), most boors will nevertheless begin to answer them and gradually drive themselves into a dead end.
Step 6
Agree with the boor. This consent costs you nothing. You do not become worse, uglier, if in the tram with a radiant smile you answer the rude to you unkempt citizen or citizen "You are absolutely right!" But after your consent, the stream of abuse will surely subside. This means that the world will become a little calmer and cleaner.
