Hearing stories about yourself from unfamiliar people is always unpleasant. Gossips and gossips have always existed and will continue to exist. The motives of their actions and the reasons why someone else's life becomes more interesting than their own can be identified a lot. But it's better to just silence the gossip, as soon as he starts "washing someone's bones." After all, if he talks about someone behind his back, most likely, he does it behind your back too.
Give a firm rebuff
The best solution to the problem is to put the gossip in place by firmly stating his position. If you witness how someone began to discuss someone's life without the presence of the person being discussed, you can make it clear in a soft or rude form that gossip is a manifestation of a person's weakness. Most often, gossipers take advantage of the fact that no one enters into open confrontation with them, and this can be used. They will have nothing to argue, because gossiping is really unworthy for a self-respecting person.
You can use neutral phrases: “I don’t want to talk about this topic”, “I am not interested in this”, etc. You can act harder if the gossips don't understand the first time: “Why don't you ask Masha / Petit / Klava Ivanovna herself?”, “Just scratch a lot behind your back with tongues,” etc.
If this happens in a work collective, most likely, you will have to deal with this quite often, therefore, you need to indicate your position immediately and very clearly. Otherwise, you will also be drawn into the discussion of someone else's life.
Ignore what is happening
Ignoring is considered another option for dealing with the gossip problem. You can ignore the spread of rumors, defiantly get up and leave when someone starts an unpleasant conversation, turn on the headphones and in every possible way not notice either the gossips themselves or their violent activity. Someone knows how to do this tactfully, without hurting the feelings of others, others think that, on the contrary, it is necessary to emphasize in every possible way the unacceptable behavior of gossips.
If the situation occurs at work, the best way to ignore is to be actively involved in work. You do not need to go and drink coffee with those who will definitely start a conversation about someone else or will ask you for something. It is better to be engaged in business, to be in time for everything and to show that at work, first of all, you need to work. Someone who really works has absolutely no time to chat with gossips and pay attention to someone else's life.
Change the topic
A popular technique to counter the spread of gossip is to change the topic of conversation. So, as soon as someone starts their favorite "Can you imagine …?", You can say: "Yes, that's what, but about Johnny Depp in the newspaper they write that …". This, of course, will not end the conversation, but let it be better for those who like to “wash the bones” discussing Johnny Depp, who is hardly familiar with them, than the new secretary of the boss or a sick employee.
In the office, you can easily switch the attention of gossipers to work moments. It is also quite easy to translate the topic here: "By the way, girls-boys, did you check the last report for sure?" or "What have you decided about the holidays?" There may be many options, but, of course, the gossipers may not understand that in this way you were trying to end their unpleasant conversation.
