How can you influence another person, win you over to your side in an argument or discussion, gain support, get a positive response to a request, or just arouse sympathy?
Successful communication skills will help build a career, harmonize personal life, and find an approach to any person. Become an interesting conversationalist with a few rules.
Our life is closely connected with communication. Every day we contact, interact and resolve issues with colleagues, friends, partners, representatives of various services and organizations. Knowing and applying a few simple techniques will help you get what you want without harm to others, but with benefit to you.
1. Magic sounds of the name. Address the other person by name in the conversation as often as possible. A proper name magically affects a person, denotes him as a person. When a person hears his name, he feels significant, needed and important in this world. It's nice to hear your name, its sounds evoke positive emotions in the subconscious. A trusting contact is established between people, the interlocutors are determined to understand each other's needs and find a mutually beneficial solution.
2. Ask for help. Ask for help with something. It could be anything. The main thing is for a person to do a good, useful thing for you. Set up a computer program, download an interesting film, translate a complex phrase in a foreign text, get a necessary or rare book. When people do something good, they are positively charged and motivated to do it again.
3. Ask for the impossible in order to get what you want. Ask for more and you will not be denied a little. For example, you have made a request that is difficult to fulfill. "Sergei Petrovich, replace me at the lectures in the next two months." Sergey Petrovich, most likely, will give up long-term inconveniences. But he won't be able to refuse a replacement for a week. People feel uncomfortable and uncomfortable after refusal and try to help, meet halfway, if they address a real, adequate need.
4. Give compliments. An important rule is sincerity. Don't come up with something that doesn't exist if you can find a feature or quality to be praised for. The interlocutor knows very well his strengths and weaknesses, what is great and what is not. Find that zest that can be one hundred percent highlighted and sincerely sung. For example, an English teacher has excellent pronunciation, and you know that she did her internship in London. She also knows about it. Truthful and pleasant.
5. Be balanced. Remain calm even in those cases when you are 100% convinced that you are right, and the interlocutor expresses thoughts that are completely far from the truth. Listen to your opponent completely and completely. Try to understand and feel his motives, arguments, feelings. Filter out those ideas and views that you share and put it in your own words. You will have points of harmony and solidarity, the so-called anchors. A common pier to push off from. Community unites and evokes a positive attitude. Then you can state your position, having a significant chance that the interlocutor will listen to your opinion.
6. Take a trip through the looking glass. Imagine that you are a mirror. Try to reflect the mannerisms of your interlocutor, the tempo and timbre of the voice, manner of speech, gestures, postures, facial expressions. People have a positive attitude towards those who imitate them. But remember, everything is good in moderation. Imitation should not be exaggerated and immediate. Has the interlocutor changed his position? Wait a little and sit down the same way. By copying another, you acknowledge his authority and importance. This makes him more confident, increases self-esteem and mood, and evokes positive emotions towards other people.
7. Support the other person non-verbally. Give up the poses of closeness and isolation - arms crossed on the chest, cross-legged, crossed ankles.
Lean forward slightly without taking up the personal space of the interlocutor. This will show your interest.
Nod your head slightly as you talk. This gesture sets up agreement and solidarity with the conversation partner.
Use reflective listening. Retell the other person's thoughts in your own words. The meaning is one, and the verbal presentation is individual. It's like cooperation, you make it clear to the person that you support him, share thoughts and feelings, empathize.
Show a sincere interest in people, smile at a joke, ask questions, thank you for your help. Then communication will be not only effective, but also pleasant. Communicate with pleasure!
