Trust is a very important ingredient in a relationship. It is also a very fragile thing, so it is said that it is easy to lose trust, but difficult or even impossible to return. A relationship where it does not exist cannot be called strong, because there is no calmness, a sense of reliability in them. But there are excruciating doubts and anxiety. How can the lost trust be restored, and can it be done at all?
First of all, you need to have the hope that the relationship can somehow be restored. Better yet, have a deep conviction that you can do it. In addition, each partner needs to have a strong desire to maintain the relationship. This is necessary because building trust again requires a number of attempts and compromises.
If you are the partner who created the problem, the hardest part for you will be to decide for yourself that you are trustworthy. The very first thing you need to do is apologize, admit your mistakes, and ask for an opportunity to correct them. If your partner does not agree to go to reconciliation or is not ready to do it, do not put pressure on him and do not rush to change his decision. Give him time to think, calm down, make an informed decision.
Over time, when the resentment is forgotten or at least not so strong, try again (or several attempts) to reconcile with your partner. Try to talk about your relationship. Explain that they are very important to you and that you want them back. If your reconciliation has taken place and you made a promise, stay true to your word. Decide for yourself to continue to be honest with this person and stick to your decision no matter what the cost.
If you are the one who was betrayed, and you still have resentment, it will be difficult for you to believe your partner until your feelings subside. Take your time to go to reconciliation, until the resentment and pain subside, bide your time. When you can more calmly take what happened, talk to your partner, try to listen to him and understand. Try to imagine yourself in his place, understand his motives, and then try to forgive him. This is necessary not only for him, but also for you. After all, if you do not forgive the offense, it will sit inside you, poisoning your life. In case you want to rebuild the relationship, you need to help your partner - create real and feasible conditions for what he must do to build trust.
You have to rebuild the relationship, so each of you needs to make a compromise. If your conditions seem impossible for the culprit to fulfill the problem, you will have to make some kind of compromise. For example, slightly soften or change requirements that are too strict (as your partner sees them). But, if your offender exaggerates the impracticability of the requirements, because he does not want to change something in himself, it is better not to make concessions or at least wait for a while.
Never lose your confidence that you will be able to restore your relationship, because she is the thing that will help you get through all these difficulties. When you come out of the problem in a relationship with a forgiving heart and lightness in your soul, empathizing with your loved one, you will benefit greatly from all this - you will become wiser and more tolerant. If your relationship seems uncertain and shaky, you began to be overcome by doubts about your future, be patient. Because it takes time to restore everything.
A partner who cannot be trusted will not feel confident and calm. He will not be able to feel loved, because he will think his partner has ulterior motives. He cannot be capable of intimate connection, because thinks the other will be wrong. The person who has lost confidence will become confused, depressed and angry. This means that he will not be happy. On the other hand, the person who betrayed him experiences much the same if he is worried about his partner and wants to keep the relationship.
Of course, the relationship will no longer remain the same. They will become different, but better or worse - it depends entirely on the efforts of the two of you. The main thing is to believe that you will succeed.
