The boss raised his voice, her husband undeservedly accused of something, on the street they faced rudeness. You feel confusion, depression, despair … What to do? Learning to fight back!
Instructions
Step 1
To begin with, pay attention to the emotions you experience in a conflict situation. Confusion, uncertainty, fear? Or maybe internal aggression? This is normal, everyone has the right to experience these emotions. But in this situation, they are not constructive. Therefore, the first step towards the ability to fight back will be the development of self-regulation.
Step 2
The ability to remain calm and judicious is a valuable skill that comes in handy in many situations. To do this, start doing auto-training and meditation. Treat the situation philosophically, assess it on the scale of the Universe.
Step 3
Don't forget about humor - this is a good way to relieve tension and fear of the attacker. Imagine him with a saucepan on his head and noodles slowly sliding over his shoulders, or "put" a clown nose on him - in general, use your imagination.
Step 4
Never make excuses. Thus, you only aggravate your situation, and allow the abuser to gain an emotional victory over you. Justification is a consequence of guilt and a desire to look worthy in the eyes of others. Get rid of the feeling of guilt, in most cases it is not justified by anything and is the result of "winding up" yourself, and the opinion of others is unlikely to change dramatically. If you make a mistake, admit it and offer options for how you can fix it. But, in any case, no one has the right to accuse you of anything in an impartial form.
Step 5
Think ahead of how you can respond to challenging behavior. Prepare universal arguments, and, if possible, specific phrases, with the help of which you can adequately get out of the situation. It is not necessary to slip into mutual insults, but at the same time, do not be afraid to offend the attacker - sometimes a rather harsh response is necessary to put a person in his place.
Step 6
Also, humor will come to the rescue. In order to respond to a caustic remark with an ironic remark, after which it will be pointless to attack you, you need to practice, but it's worth it.
Step 7
Examine your weak points, this is where the blow is often directed. Most often these are hidden complexes or conscious, but not accepted character traits. Awareness and acceptance of these features removes a strong emotional reaction to barbs, and you gain the ability to soberly assess the situation and adequately respond to the attacker. It is worth noting that the offender is driven by the same forces - latent complexes.
Step 8
Finally, remember that people behave towards you the way you let them behave.
