The behavior of a loved one sometimes raises many questions. If you want to change someone nearby, it will take a lot of effort. The transformation is difficult, but with constant exposure it can be very successful.
Instructions
Step 1
Psychologists say that any change must start with yourself. You will have to deal with your own development in order to get a good result. First, determine what the person is doing wrong, what you want to change. You can transform little things, or you can do something very significant, but you need to understand that a person's character is formed in childhood and a complete adjustment is unlikely.
Step 2
When the list is ready, think about why the person is behaving this way and not otherwise. Perhaps this is part of your fault. If someone close to him chooses a position, it is always connected with those around him. Evaluate all the motives, honestly tell yourself what prompted the person to choose this path. If you see your shortcomings, start changing them, and only then advise something else. The true reason can explain everything, if you find it, change it, then life will become completely different. Do not look at the consequences, but look for the original source.
Step 3
You need to start the transformation with a conversation. In a relaxed atmosphere, discuss anything that does not suit you. At the same time, it is very important not to shout, but to listen to the arguments of the person. You need to understand his motives, hear the arguments, and then offer your own. In such interactions, compromise is often born. Do not be afraid to be honest, open and speak in person, this is much better than being silent and patient. Dialogue will allow both sides to make concessions and resolve the situation in the best possible way.
Step 4
There is no need to make claims, shout or demand anything. The order tone always causes only irritation and rejection. Talk to the person calmly, openly, without negativity. Reproaches never make life better, they don't work, a different approach is needed. Learn to ask, speak softly and gently. And do not think that you will not be heard. If there is an idea in his head that he will not do anything anyway, this will happen. Our thoughts sometimes materialize faster than words.
Step 5
For realization, a person often lacks support. Irritability, aggression, negativity are sometimes the result of uncertainty and lack of warmth. Give your loved ones your love, believe in their undertakings, trust their words. If a person realizes that someone appreciates him, that someone will always be there, he begins to behave differently. Sincere feelings work wonders. Change your attitude, nervousness for calmness, claims for soft requests. And do not forget to reward the person for all the achievements.
Step 6
Sometimes you need to change not a person, but your attitude to his actions. There are moments that cannot be changed. Think, are they very critical? Sometimes people around you pay attention to little things that don't matter much. If something can't be fixed, maybe it's worth looking at it from a different angle? All people are not perfect, and you can close your eyes to some of the shortcomings, but the advantages are worth looking at over and over again.
