There is such a psychological phenomenon as the "first impression effect." This is the image of the interlocutor, which was formed in the very first minutes of acquaintance and has a strong influence on all subsequent communication.
Don't try to please
It should be said that the desire to please should not become an end in itself. If in the course of dating you only think about how not to lose face, nothing good will come of it. First, with such thoughts, you will only think about yourself, and not about the interlocutor, which will negatively affect the conversation. Secondly, you will be very stressed and anxious as you ponder what you can do wrong.
Don't be afraid to be yourself
If in life you are funny and strange - this should become your advantage, not a disadvantage. Do not be afraid of yourself and your personality, otherwise a new acquaintance will get the impression that they are communicating with him under some kind of mask. Sincerity attracts others to itself.
Learn empathy
The ability to listen to the interlocutor is necessary at the first meeting. Make it clear that you are interested in communication, it is important for you to know the person's past and the continuation of his stories. Ask clarifying questions, ask again, be attentive to the little things. This skill is acquired through continuous practice.
Take a different perspective on communication
Too often we are faced with situations where the interlocutor misunderstands us. Imagine how your speech is heard by a person who is not aware of the entire background and your thoughts. So can he understand you as you intended? The three-position model of perception helps in the analysis of such situations. Try to imagine yourself in the place of another person: what is he interested in, how does he see you in this communication?
Practice
Make new acquaintances, practice your communication skills. Theories are great, but without practice they are worthless. If you are learning NLP or empathy skills, you should immediately try to apply them in life. So you will understand that some points of theories need to be changed to suit your own characteristics, learn to understand yourself and other people.
Evolve
To please other people, you need to work hard on your personality. Read, learn, travel - become a really interesting person. Then people themselves will take the initiative in communicating with you.
