The fact of marriage today has changed somewhat - it is determined by the conduct of the joint life of the couple, and only then by the stamp in the passport. However, there are still stereotypes about the so-called old maidens, the reason for the existence of which lies in the mists of time. This is the paradox of our days - foundations are crumbling, but stereotypes remain.
The concept of "old maid" is ephemeral today. Consequently, there is no unique label that once reflected the material and social inconsistency of the individual. Moreover, the fair sex today does not have to get married in order to be realized - she may well achieve her goals on her own.
However, in society, especially in the Russian provinces, there are still stereotypes that deprive unmarried older people of self-confidence. Due to the mentality, these stereotypes are ineradicable. The reasons why the girl decided to postpone the marriage, I will not identify, since they are different. Nevertheless, the fact remains - an unpleasant judgment "old maid". But the framework is erased and such a conclusion about the status of the girl has more of a personal than a social background. But how to live if sharp questions and comments about marriage and family are already haunted by others?
First, you must maintain your own dignity. Decent people will not become sarcastically and idly interested in the peculiarities of a girl's personal life and worldview, and, even more so, react with an excuse or an equally incorrect answer. Some are just waiting for the moment at which it is easy to provoke a conflict and compromise a person with base deeds. It is necessary to monitor the appearance, actions and behavior, even much more diligently than the ladies who have found female happiness do.
Secondly, to correct personal qualities and character traits. Knowing the strengths and weaknesses of your own personality, you can, by working on yourself, minimize the influence of the former and maximize the latter. For example, transform selfishness into independence, discarding self-righteousness and nihilism, shocking - into individuality, softening shocking manners of self-expression to more acceptable in society, pragmatism and coldness - into common sense, eliminating indifference and excessive isolation. It is worth trying to suppress complexes in yourself.
Thirdly, you need to clearly define life positions, priorities and goals. By answering the questions “What do I want? Do I need this? How to achieve this?”, The degree of self-importance can be determined with the highest probability. For example, if creating a family is not the goal of your whole life, then why strive to achieve it in the near future or in general? Otherwise, violence against oneself turns out and there is nothing worse than a family where love and kindness do not reign.
Fourthly, it is necessary to actively pursue the designated and set goals. This movement should be planned, phased, not evoking a reaction from others - let them see the results and facts. Otherwise, you can be considered an absurd, comical, and therefore a miserable creature that, in clothes, screams about his unsettled fate in his clothes.
What do I mean by actively pursuing goals? For example, there can be career and professional growth at work. In the family - harmony in relations with family and friends. The pursuit of marriage can be accompanied by intelligent and tactful seeking with a relaxed demeanor when meeting potential grooms. Nobody canceled spiritual and personal growth and self-development. You need to constantly develop, otherwise, after a short bifurcation, the moral potential will abruptly decline.
And the last thing. Perfection, self-confidence, calmness, tact, delicacy, dignity, humanity, courage and dedication and common sense are all key factors in removing complexes and overcoming stereotypes. "Old maid" does not mean unclaimed. Just until her main exit came.
