How to get rid of pity for others, why some people feel sorry for everyone, even to the detriment of themselves. Let's analyze seven non-obvious reasons from psychology.
I think many people have a friend or acquaintance who take to heart any tragic news of his city, country or world. Or maybe you yourself move away from bad news for days, regularly donate all your money and things to charity, take on the solution of other people's problems and stay awake at night patrolling social networks in the hope of getting positive news on some topic?
Today we are discussing the origin of pity for everyone and the desire to help everyone, to save everyone. And also let's talk about how to stop taking everything to heart, because such a life is exhausting. In my opinion, there are seven reasons for excessive pity for others.
Self pity
Perhaps, on a subconscious level, you want to help yourself, including yourself from the past. Or do you want to help someone in your life. In general, there is an uncovered gestalt - an unresolved situation from the past. For example, if you take everything connected with children close to your heart, then perhaps at these moments you remember your pain from childhood. Moreover, your story and the story of another child may be completely different, but the point is that the little man is bad. Just like that little person who lives inside you.
Heightened sense of justice
Some people have such a character trait. It is formed, as a rule, also on the basis of personal injuries, but in this case it is not so important. The bottom line is that a person cannot remain indifferent if he sees that someone's rights are being violated, that someone is suffering and cannot help himself.
High level of empathy
This is another personality characteristic that is difficult to change. Some people are naturally more sensitive to the emotions and experiences of others. Try to remember how long ago it started. If it continues for as long as you can remember, then there is a high probability that the reason is precisely in excessive empathy.
Feelings of shame
We return to the unclosed gestalts again. Perhaps you once refused to help someone or were unable to help for certain reasons. You live with this burden and try to make atonement by helping others.
Unmet need for love and recognition
Perhaps, by sympathizing and helping someone, you expect reciprocal gratitude, love, and reward. Or you just want to feel significant, important.
Fears
You may feel sorry for people in situations that remind you of your biggest fears. Living these stories, on the one hand, you calm yourself down, as it were, protect yourself, regain control. On the other hand, you become a hostage to fear: you cannot let go of the situation until it is resolved safely, and only then will you feel safe.
Avoiding reality and your problems
Perhaps something bothers you in your personal life so much that you are ready to run away from it into the life of any other person and solve other people's problems. The main thing is not your own.
How to stop feeling sorry for others
How to stop taking everything to heart, after all, it’s not far from a real illness? First of all, understand the reasons for your behavior. Analyze all the situations in which you start to tear your soul again. Get to the main emotion and thought. Reread the list of possible causes again. What does it look like? Then make a plan to work with your cause.
