Conscious or unconscious manipulation is constantly present in interpersonal communication. Parental attitudes, life experience or certain character traits make some people "pull the strings", while others - become a puppet in the hands of the interlocutor. If you do not want to be the victim of a manipulator's mental attack, then you should learn to recognize people of this type and keep communication with them to a minimum.
Instructions
Step 1
Look at the root. Wanting to establish contact, the manipulator demonstrates exactly those personal qualities that the interlocutor wants to see. By creating an image of a person who is pleasant in all respects, sociable and reliable, he hopes to win the trust and sympathy of his future "victim". It can be quite difficult to notice the pretense and insincerity of emotions. During a conversation, the manipulator expresses his benevolent attitude in every possible way: with smiles, postures, approving facial expressions and gestures. He prefers to listen more than to speak, agreeing with his interlocutor in almost everything and demonstrating a genuine interest in the topic of conversation. The manipulator's speech is replete with benevolent intonations and significant pauses. You should be alerted if the interlocutor prefers not to talk about himself, but, on the contrary, in every possible way provokes you to be frank. After all, the desire to express your opinion is absolutely normal for any person.
Step 2
Avoid mirrors. Mirroring is one of the basic principles of NLP (neurolinguistic programming). This method allows you to arrange the interlocutor to yourself, arouse his trust and quickly establish contact. However, not everyone uses it for good purposes. If you notice that your communication partner is trying to reproduce your gestures, postures, manner of speaking, or even the pace of breathing, then you should be careful and avoid being overly frank.
Step 3
Check with failure. An experienced manipulator is a charming and pleasant person. Therefore, in the course of a conversation, it can be difficult to realize that he simply wants to take advantage of you. If any suspicions crept into your head, respond to his request with a categorical refusal. This technique in psychology is called "breaking the template." After all, most likely, indecision, doubt, and, possibly, instant agreement are expected from you. A firm "no" will help remove the mask of goodwill from the manipulator and reveal his true intentions. So, the interlocutor may begin to dramatize the situation, portraying the negative consequences of your decision, or appeal to their previous positive experiences. In any case, trying to impose certain views or vision on you is a clear sign of manipulation.
