Do I need to raise a baby or wait until he turns a year or two? You need to start, perhaps, even during pregnancy, only this upbringing should correspond to age.
We will not return to uterine development, but I would like to remind you that your physical and psychological state during gestation, as well as the process of childbirth, have already influenced the character of your baby. The genes passed on to him by mom and dad also affected his character. And many of the predispositions from this "starter set" are ready to be reinforced or not reinforced by the personal example of the parents.
In fact, the upbringing of the first year of life is the work of educators on themselves. The choice of the "system", self-development, adaptation to new conditions of existence, the development of new roles.
There is a contact
In the first days, weeks and months of his life, the child first of all needs a loving mother or the person who constantly replaces her. Next to the mother, the baby feels safe, his needs are met on time, and his cry is responded to. The prolactin in mother's milk acts as a sedative. He begins to like this world. Basic trust is formed, attachment to other people is formed. Without these qualities, it will be difficult for a child to build trusting relationships in the future and create a strong family.
The role of dad at this time is to support mom: to replace her in sleepless nights, to take over some of the household chores, to cheer up or instill confidence in difficult times. It goes without saying that communication between dad and baby will also benefit both of them.
Who sleeps with whom
The need for physical contact is met during feeding, holding, and sleeping together if you practice. The opinions of many respected psychologists, educators and pediatricians about where a child should sleep are divided. Personally, I always thought that I could not sleep with a newborn child, but in practice it turned out the opposite - a couple of months after the birth of my daughter, I myself felt calmer when she slept next to me.
Separate or Shared Sleep? Both options have their pros and cons. Use the “opinions” of all your family members to make a decision.
- Is it convenient for you?
- Do you often have to get up at night to feed your baby?
- How lightly do you sleep?
- Does your baby sleep more peacefully when in the crib or next to you?
- What does your husband think about sleeping together with your child?
We are responsible for those we "tamed"
“Do not accustom to hands”, - friends insist. “You have to let him roar and then pick him up,” say others, while still others “bear” their babies in sling. There are a lot of opinions. But human nature, as our instincts speak, is characterized by an inseparable closeness with a small child. Otherwise, he would not have survived.
Yes, the kid often wants to handle. But the research of psychotherapists confirms that the more he uses this opportunity, the easier it is to then climb down to meet the world around him. Have you ever seen a forty-year-old uncle sitting in the arms of his mother? And fifteen? Yes, after six or seven years they cannot be seated by force. It has also been noticed that babies deprived of their mother's hands in the first months tend to make up for this later, requiring increased attention from their mother.
Carrying it in your arms provides your child with a greater view, allows you to observe your actions and, most importantly, your reaction to what is happening. You talk to your child more often. All this has a beneficial effect on its development.
If you do not take a crying child in your arms, he perceives it as the absence of your love. Be afraid of not giving intimacy with you, it is unlikely that it will be possible to convey.
Words of love
From the moment you learn about your pregnancy, it is advisable to start talking to your baby about how you love him. If you haven't already done this, then start immediately. It is important for a child to know that he is loved, that he is good, long-awaited, intelligent, kind, cheerful, beautiful. Tell him about it as often as possible, and he will be so.
More confident and bolder
A self-confident mom is a gift for baby's self-esteem. Already now it begins to take shape from what gives the child a mother's inner state. Do not be discouraged, do not be afraid to make mistakes, do not blame yourself for the moments of weakness, try to relax, rest, enjoy life and your child. Do not forget that you always divide your mood in the early years of motherhood, at least in two. If it doesn't work out, purposefully work on your own self-esteem.
Creative atmosphere
Children are interested in everything that is happening around. Everyone in the literal sense of the word. And those holes in the socket, and this edge of the sofa, and your new expensive telephone and your grandmother's service. In order for everyone to feel good, your task is to organize a safe space for the child in which he can freely develop, and you do not have to shout every five minutes: "Well, where are you, stop !!!" or pulling dangerous objects out of your hands. Let the baby be available what he can and needs. In the case of acquaintance with unwanted objects, turn his attention to something that does not threaten him.
Talking Mom
The more you talk to your child, the better. Comment on all your actions, especially those that are aimed at the baby himself: “now I’ll take you by hand,” “we are going to wash,” “mom is reading a book,” etc. Your "chatter" will help your child learn the language faster.
Less "no" and "no"
If everything around is forbidden, then the baby and not remember so many all sorts of "impossible". Try to use this word as little as possible and stick to your own rules. It is difficult for a child to understand why it is possible to take your phone when mom has no time, but she does not want to share it at another time.
Cartoons-remotes
Child psychologists advise to protect the child from the TV. Even cartoons are recommended for viewing only from the age of two. Moreover, in the first months of life, keep your baby away from all kinds of screens. It is still difficult for a little man to separate the virtual from the real; he may be frightened by the information that has fallen on him.
We develop together
For the development of the baby, joint games with the naming of body parts, elements of charging or massage, reading children's books with the obligatory examination of pictures, singing songs, nursery rhymes, reading rhymes will be useful. But there is nothing more useful than mother's love and care.
The parents themselves must strive to be a worthy example for their children. Give up bad habits, try to sort out your internal and external problems, bridge the knowledge gaps associated with parenting and do not forget about your own interests and hobbies outside of parenting and that everyone has the right to make mistakes sometimes.
