It is often possible to observe a situation where a team uses one or more of its members for the role of "scapegoat". It is not easy for people living this role. Is there a way to get out of this role?
The main reasons for securing the role of a "scapegoat" for a person are low self-esteem, hidden ambitions and disrespect for the people around them. What to do if you realize that this role is relevant to you? How to overcome the influence of the collective?
1. Analyze the reasons for low self-esteem.
Usually the cause of low self-esteem is unfavorable or inadequate relationships in the parental family. If the child is treated as the cause of family failures and the failed life of one of the parents, then inevitably the child absorbs this attitude and reproduces it further in life. It is difficult to resolve these situations on your own and to realize all the negative scenarios received in the parental family. In most cases, you will need the help of a psychologist.
2. Become aware of hidden ambition and desire for superiority over other people and give up on them.
Here you need to honestly admit to yourself the presence of these aspirations and not support them. You need to observe yourself for a long time and track these desires. When they arise, and they can appear for a long time, you just need to observe them and try not to embody in life, because now you understand that their cause is the destructive events experienced in the past. Try to find activities that will benefit others. So you can bridge the gap between you and those around you, which was previously expressed in the experience of a feeling of rejection from others and your own desire to reject.
3. Develop a sense of respect for other people.
A person who truly respects other people simply cannot be the scapegoat. Others simply will not have a reciprocal desire to constantly “put in place” and humiliate such a person. However, sincerely respecting people is not so easy if this quality is not present initially. This skill needs to be cultivated and developed.
For this, write a list of 20 points for which you can respect each person in the team or the team as a whole. This exercise should be done regularly at first and will help you gradually focus on positive qualities and develop respect for others.
So, in order to get out of the role of the "scapegoat", you need to do some serious inner work to change yourself. Some stages can be done independently, but somewhere you need the help of a specialist. However, it is quite possible to change yourself and take a more constructive position when interacting in a team.
