Parents are worried, sometimes excessively, about the possible consequences of the negative experiences of their children: will not a long business trip or divorce entail severe psychological trauma that will make itself felt in adulthood?
What is psychological trauma
Trauma is not a terrible situation that has happened in a person's life (adult or young). These are its consequences for the psyche. That is, when we say "trauma", we mean the price for life, the protection that the psyche has developed for the sake of survival in the most difficult and threatening situation for human life. Having withstood the trauma, the body survived, but this does not mean that it remained intact and the same as it was before.
When certain traumatic events occur, they are stored in the nervous system along with memories - images, a picture of the event, sounds, smells.
What is the danger of psychotrauma for children
The first thing to remember is that trauma leaves a mark. An adult, mature person has more ability to cope with trauma than a child. For a child in whom the brain and nervous system matures for 20 years (and some parts of the brain take longer), the consequences of traumatic events can be extremely serious. First of all, this is the impact on brain functionality, or rather on the cognitive component (thinking), the emotional component and social interaction. In other words, when a child is diagnosed with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), we may observe a number of symptoms that have a negative impact on the child's quality of life. At the same time, one should not assume that the trauma has an irreversible impact on the life and psyche of the child.
Myth 1 - trauma has an irreversible effect on a child's life
No, it’s not like that. When it so happened that the baby had to go through a difficult situation, then first of all it is worth assessing in which areas of life the injury struck. For a child to cope, he needs the help of a stable, supportive, and resourceful adult. In other words, the best medicine for a child is to be able to safely respond to trauma, gain support, empathy, and a sense of stability from adults.
Myth 2 - Immediately after the incident, it is necessary to provide emergency psychological assistance
The child is already experiencing the load at the moment of injury. If the parents are trying to “make life easier”, to divert attention, to amuse, “so that the child will forget,” then the child's nervous system bears an even greater load. Of course, every father and mother wants to immediately alleviate the child's condition and help, and we do this reflexively, because it is difficult for them to withstand the child's suffering. So, there is first psychological aid, the principle of which is to provide basic human needs (to report what happened, provide housing, safety, sleep and connect with loved ones if they have been lost).
Myth 3 - after a traumatic event, the child will have PTSD
Only a specialist (psychologist, psychiatrist) can diagnose PTSD. If parents observe manifestations such as:
- a game that is constantly repeated and where elements of a psycho-traumatic situation are reflected,
- sleep disorders / nightmares (no explicit content),
- difficulties in communication,
- unwillingness to communicate,
- excessive impulsivity and aggression,
- distraction of attention and inability to concentrate,
With these symptoms, you should definitely consult a specialist. But keep in mind that not all children have PTSD as a reaction to trauma.
Myth 4 - the child will quickly forget about the trauma
But in this statement we meet with the opposite belief that everything will be ok. Of course, it also happens that we forget those unpleasant situations and moments of life that happened to us, but this does not mean that then we were not injured. It so happens that already adults, we cannot understand why we are afraid of dogs, because we do not remember how the dog scared us in childhood. But if we are talking about severe traumatic experiences, then the child will never forget such events. He will learn to survive, and then live, but will not forget.
Probably, for each of us there is a list of ideas and beliefs regarding the impact of traumatic events on life. And we remain and will be loving parents who will always try to do the best we can for their children.
