When the desires and goals of the opponents do not coincide, they can come into confrontation with each other. Often, one of the parties becomes a clash provocateur. First you need to understand that conflict itself is normal. Only your behavior in conflict should be controlled.
Instructions
Step 1
Don't be afraid of conflicts as such. Each of them can lead to the development of relationships and to obtaining information about a person. Or, on the contrary, it will plunge opponents into a quarrel, which is completely undesirable. Don't let this happen. To do this, never make generalizations, do not stoop to insults and assessing the opponent's personality traits. And also control your emotions and the tone of the conversation.
Step 2
Becoming the initiator of the conflict, take into account that it has its beginning, the highest point of development and resolution. When reporting your grievances to your partner, use “I-statements” that describe feelings. For example, not “You take documents from my desk without permission”, but “I am very perplexed that the papers I need disappear from my desk”. The words are pronounced confidently, but not in a “metallic” tone. Thus, with the correct start of the conflict, both parties can come to an optimal resolution.
Step 3
It happens that another person is the first to show discontent. At the same time, the opponent often behaves aggressively. If you feel guilty, feel free to agree with him: "Sorry, I was wrong." This will remove the intensity of passions. Please note that the strategies for behavior in conflict are as follows: withdrawal, concession, rivalry and compromise. In this case, one type of behavior can smoothly flow into another.
Step 4
If a person behaves destructively, that is, throws out his anger and shouts out insults, then the best way to resolve the conflict is not rivalry, but avoiding it or even concession. Thus, with an interlocutor in a state of passion, it is worth talking carefully, as with a patient. Wait for the emotions to subside, and only after a while, decide whether to continue clarifying the situation or leave everything as it is in order to preserve the world. In this situation, the words of the following content will help: “I do not want to talk to you in such a tone. We will continue the conversation after your apology."
Step 5
In this case, do not descend to the level of the offender. Do not answer him with similar words. Most likely, you will reconcile later, and feelings of guilt and shame from abandoned words will not give you peace for a long time. The rivalry strategy is only useful if resolving the situation in your favor becomes a vital issue. Decide for yourself what is more important at the moment - to sacrifice your interests and keep the peace or achieve your goal. If you are sure that you are right, then take a chance. This is sometimes useful.
Step 6
The worst thing is when confrontation for a person is the only habitual policy in conflict situations. Permanent conflict avoidance is also not an unambiguously acceptable method. He teaches a person to run from problems, and not solve them. And a person who is always inferior to everyone, because he believes that the main thing is "world peace", in a team will not enjoy authority. And he will never achieve success in his business.
Step 7
Conflict resolution is most effective when compromise is accepted. That is, a decision is made that suits both parties. In this situation, they make concessions to each other. At the same time, each side has the opportunity to fulfill its claims exactly 50 to 50. If the case is not one of the most vital, then choose this option and come to a consensus.
