Practically everyone does general cleaning in their house from time to time, but very few decide to do the same for the accumulated resentment and disappointment in their souls. Blocks from memories of unpleasant situations and past troubles can be stored in a person's soul for decades.
Instructions
Step 1
To learn to forgive, you must decide to take responsibility for your own emotions and experiences. Experiencing resentment, people often say: "How can I forgive this, because they did this to me here!" But this approach demonstrates that a person reacts to an external stimulus and succumbs to it. Forgiving old grudges is important not because you are doing your offenders a favor by “letting go” of their sins, but because you are throwing this old garbage out of your own soul. Decide for yourself what to keep inside and what to get rid of.
Step 2
Forgiveness is not based on changing the past: it cannot be done. But you can change your own attitude to what happened, try to erase unpleasant memories. Therefore, the first thing, realizing that forgiveness depends only on you and that you need it, try to look at your life philosophically. Try to understand what motivated those who hurt you. Sometimes it helps a lot to look at situations in detail, this is sometimes enough to forgive.
Step 3
After you realize that you no longer hold anger at the offender, your emotions can still try to follow the beaten path for a long time: negative thoughts will arise in your head. The fact is that the human brain gets used to think in a certain way. So when you start working on your grievances, start monitoring your thoughts closely at the same time. Record negative considerations and get rid of them. If you cannot do this in a rational way, then you can be distracted by something pleasant. Consciously tune in to a positive outlook every morning.
Step 4
Try to get rid of negative emotions from resentment. To do this, you need to do two things in sequence. First, write down in detail how it all happened and how you felt. Most likely, emotions will overwhelm you, you can start crying, it will hurt to experience it again. When you are calm, repeat the procedure. As you write down your experiences several times, they will subside and become much less intense. Expressing your pain, releasing it from the inside is very important. This method can be very difficult to do alone if the injury is serious or the hurt is deep and fresh. It is better to work in this case with a psychologist.
Step 5
When the emotions are out, you will feel a little empty. This is normal. Now write down the whole situation again, but change the ending. Make it work well. Try to imagine a positive ending in every detail. This will replace bad emotions with good ones.
