Almost every day in our life there are circumstances that can cause irritation, aggression, and sometimes outbursts of anger. Situations can be very different: pushed in transport, got stuck in a traffic jam, problems at work, forgotten keys, and so on. Sometimes even the most insignificant stupidity causes bouts of anger and irritation, which, of course, we throw out on others. Our behavior seems to us to be correct, because psychologists advise not to restrain your emotions.
Looking at the situation from the other side, you begin to realize that it is stupid and wrong to vent your anger on others, the problem cannot be solved in this way, but losing a friend or loved one is quite real. Reflecting on your own behavior, sometimes it becomes scary and ashamed. How to curb your anger and stop hurting and insulting loved ones and not so people?
To solve the problem of seemingly unreasonable anger, you need to find the very reason. We are adults and adequate people and, naturally, we realize that anger cannot arise from scratch. Finding this cause that unsettles, and then eliminating it, you can become much happier. Let's look at an example, you are angry with a loved one who did not notice some of your achievements: for example, a new hairstyle, a delicious dinner, a slimmer body, etc., you do not need to get hysterical and shout that he is an ungrateful bastard, it is quite simple hint to her husband about a mistake;
- you need to look at the situation from the side of the interlocutor. There are situations when you are undeservedly yelled at, insulted or even pushed at, it is quite normal to do the same in response. But! Try to find out why a person behaves this way, it is quite possible that he lost someone close to him, crashed a car, one of his relatives is sick, and so on. In such cases, you no longer want to yell and offend a person, the only desire is to regret and sympathize;
- try to put yourself in the place of the interlocutor: will it be pleasant for a strong one if they start to accuse you, shout, insult you? Hardly.
- if the self-digging did not end with success and the reason for the unreasonable anger was not found, then you need to get rid of the negativity in other ways: I personally go to wash in hot water or ennoble the flower bed, someone goes to the gym, someone locks up in a room and shouts will there or crying, there are many ways, but such a discharge will bring the nervous system in order. If you have a close friend or girlfriend, you can cry into your vest, this method also works;
- to try to be distracted when everything inside is boiling with anger, of course, it is difficult, but possible. Consider with a specific example, you quarreled with your husband or loved one and immediately begin to remember that he forgot about the wedding anniversary, did not notice a new hairstyle, was late from work, so you can remember more than one hundred sins, of course, this will not improve your mood. As soon as such thoughts have firmly settled in your head, it is worth taking a break and switching to something else, for example, cleaning, dusting, cleaning pots and pans, and so on;
Most often, the feeling of anger visits us in moments of solitude. On the one hand, this is not bad, because there is no object on which to throw out all the negative. Alone, it is easier to analyze the situation and calm down. One of the best ways is considered to be a cold shower, which will invigorate and force the brain to work in the right direction. At work or in public places, you can wash your face with cold tap water, or, in order not to spoil your makeup, you can simply wash your hands with ice water.
Another way to distract yourself from anger is to think about something good. Give yourself to your beloved (beloved) 5 minutes of time in which you can look at the photo album, where you are captured with loved ones, where faces shine with happiness.
