Poor communication skills create problems in a variety of situations. An uncommunicative person usually has problems at work and in his personal life. He may suffer from loneliness and various complexes, which are the cause or consequence of the inability to establish verbal contact.
Necessary
- - diary;
- - pen;
- - the Internet;
- - help of a psychologist;
- - a ticket to the theater, to the exhibition.
Instructions
Step 1
Analyze the reasons for your lack of communication. Answer yourself to the questions: why do you avoid society? Why don't you enter into conversations and discussions? Why don't you have very or very few friends? So you will understand the reasons for your lack of communication - what specifically needs to be dealt with. Perhaps it is too underestimated or, on the contrary, overestimated self-esteem, various fears and complexes, any physiological deficiencies: stuttering, bursting, etc.
Step 2
Set a clear goal for yourself to combat your lack of communication. For tough self-control, keep a diary and write down your daily achievements in work on yourself. Remember to sum up each time, listing the points that you have done in order to become a more sociable person.
Step 3
Do what you think is difficult, unusual for your personality. Politely address simple questions to strangers, for example, with a request to answer what time it is, or explain how to get to the bus station, etc. At the same time, try to maintain visible calmness, do not be nervous, do not strain, look your interlocutor in the eyes. At first, it will be very difficult for you to do these exercises, but they will begin to break down the barriers you have established in communicating with other people. Feel free to get rid of yourself "old" and create your own new image - a sociable, liberated person.
Step 4
Do not predict in advance the negative result of your communication with other people. Get rid of the erroneous beliefs that everyone cares about you, that people will certainly consider and discuss you, treat you judgingly, etc. In fact, most people are busy with their own thoughts and problems, they also have various complexes and fears. Remember that on Earth there is not a single ideal person in all respects, and if it seems to you that you are the worst of all or many, this is far from the case.
Step 5
If it prevents you from communicating with people, on the contrary, your overestimated self-esteem, get down to earth, soberly evaluate your own achievements and dignity. Answer your questions honestly: have you achieved much of what you have on your own? How are you better than other people? Stop making too high demands on others.
Step 6
Start communicating in the virtual world via the Internet - in various chats, communities, social networks. Learn to competently and reasonably defend your own point of view in writing, remember that you have the right to do so. Just do not lock yourself in the virtual space, the temptation is great, but your goal is different, the Internet should only be a kind of bridge, a link between your communication in it and the real world.
Step 7
Please note that physiological deficiencies cannot give a serious reason to block yourself from communicating with people. First, they can be greatly exaggerated by you. Secondly, among famous personalities there are also quite a few people who stutter or burst, some of them became famous film actors, for example, Pierre Richard, Nikolai Burlyaev, who turned this drawback into a kind of zest, charm, etc. And thirdly, modern science has a huge an arsenal of techniques for eliminating such problems.
Step 8
If you find it difficult to deal with lack of communication alone, sign up for a support group with a counselor. By practicing using special techniques with people who have the same problem as yours, you will quickly find ways to solve it.
