It is impossible to meet people who look at life in exactly the same way. Different tastes, characters, temperaments, different reactions to certain events. That is why conflict, that is, a clash of interests, is an integral part of human communication. The main thing is to be able to effectively resolve it and direct it in a constructive direction.
Instructions
Step 1
Of course, the best way to deal with conflict is to avoid it. Therefore, when you feel that the conversation is taking a dangerous turn, try to smooth the situation. Behave peacefully, do not succumb to provocations. Try to ignore the attempts of your opponent to switch to raised tones, to control yourself. However, you should not avoid conflict simply for fear of being a weaker party. It is better to learn how to cope with quarrels and misunderstandings, when they have not yet managed to become overly polarized, and the relationship is too tense.
Step 2
In psychology, there is the concept of "conflict genes", that is, human actions that provoke or inflate a conflict. First of all, these include phrases that lead a conversation to a quarrel. Most people use conflictogens automatically, without thinking about the consequences, at the risk of turning any conversation into a skirmish. Indeed, by touching the interlocutor, a person receives a response, which has the only goal - to hook or offend.
Step 3
Conflict genes include accusatory and embarrassing questions. For example, "Why are you …?", "How many times do you repeat that …?", "Is it really impossible …?", "How could it be …?" etc. Such questions are not asked to obtain information, but in order to show their dissatisfaction, to arouse in the interlocutor a feeling of shame or guilt. Negative speech habits also include generalizations associated with a negative assessment of the interlocutor: "you always … (you are lazy)", "you never … (do not do it on time)", "every time you … (are late)". By monitoring your speech and avoiding conflictogens, it is much easier to control any conversation and prevent the conflict from escalating into a skirmish.
Step 4
Try to turn the conversation into a constructive channel. To do this, it is worth stopping, letting yourself and your opponent calm down. Then invite each party to share their solutions to the problem. Be prepared to compromise, because you cannot win a conflict without shedding light on the nature and character of the other side.
