Criticism is different: useful and offensive, inadequate and justified. And for many people, the issue of perceiving such someone else's opinion is very acute. It is especially difficult to experience statements from the outside about creativity, work, appearance, or anything else, people who are vulnerable, impressionable, those who already have unstable self-esteem. How can you learn to accept criticism more easily?
It is important to learn to separate from emotions the main essence hidden in criticism. Very often, if comments and statements are made in a harsh form or are voiced at a time when a person does not expect it, an extremely strong emotional reaction may follow. Internal feelings, the arising protest usually do not allow discerning the rational link within the received criticism. Therefore, at the first moment you should not try to answer in any way or immediately begin to accuse yourself and additionally criticize. It is necessary to give yourself the opportunity to cool down, to digest what you hear. This step is especially important for people who are impressionable and by nature very emotional. Sometimes, even behind offensive statements, there is some truth hidden, which is worth listening to, going over your inner protest. In order to calm the raging feelings, it is recommended to temporarily switch your vector of attention to another topic, distract yourself and concentrate on some side task. For some people, outdoor walks, music, and reading help calm their emotions.
You should only respond to criticism expressed by authoritative personalities. In everyday life and in the Internet space, you can encounter completely different people. And very often what is conventionally called criticism is in fact network trolling, a desire to really hurt or offend. Often, people who allow themselves inappropriate statements about another person try to assert themselves in this way. This must always be remembered. It is worth accepting and considering other people's criticisms if they are received from a person who seems authoritative or is an expert or professional in a particular field. So, for example, it is worth listening to the comments and advice of loved ones, parents, friends.
It is necessary to reduce the requirements for yourself. It can be very difficult to fulfill this condition for people prone to "excellent student's syndrome", to perfectionism. However, you need to work on yourself in this area. Otherwise, you can quickly come to a state of emotional burnout or even face full-fledged depression. Man is not capable of being good for everyone and everyone. It is important to accept the fact that in life there will always be someone better, more capable, that in the professional field or in the field of creativity there will always be people who have more experience, who have better time to pump their skills and abilities. Increased exactingness to yourself will not only prevent you from adequately and calmly responding to criticism from outside. This trait will also push you to additionally independently criticize yourself, scold yourself for mistakes and failures, not allowing you to learn from your mistakes. The life of any person consists of ups and downs, this must be understood and accepted. It is important to learn to praise yourself even for small achievements and look a little easier at the world around you. Changing the perception of someone else's assessment is a necessary step to ensure that you are more relaxed about any criticism. In the end, one must always remember that each person has his own taste, his own preferences.
Analysis of the received criticism and identification of the basis. So that comments from the outside are not perceived as something exclusively negative, do not underestimate the motivation for action and development, one must learn to find the main point in the criticism received. It is worth asking yourself, for what purpose could this or that person speak? What exactly can his advice give? What happens if you listen to the comments, if you follow the advice? You should not look for excuses for yourself or try to immediately defend yourself, or react in any way to a critical remark. Chances are good that an accidental or authoritative critic did not want to offend at all, that all the words were voiced only with the aim of helping in development. If in the course of the analysis it is not possible to find the main point, that is, a reason to think about whether it is worth listening to such criticism, whether it was really expressed with a desire to help and advise something, point out those mistakes that, if corrected, it will be possible to achieve some new heights.
