Peter Pan syndrome in men begins to form at a very early age. It has no organic - physiological - basis. The development of such a state is triggered, as a rule, due to family relationships, the influence on the boy from the outside. Gradually, the deformation of personality and character is growing. By a certain point, the condition begins to require work with the appropriate specialist.
The main reason that causes the development of Peter Pan syndrome is traumatic, toxic or simply inadequate parenting.
Parenting leading to the formation of the syndrome
This character deformation is based on:
- fear of growing up;
- fear of responsibility;
- fear of restriction of freedom;
- lack of independence.
As a rule, the boys, from whom men later grow up - Peter Pan, are suppressed in the family. Their opinion is either not taken into account at all or is considered by the parents as something insignificant. Gradually, the child stops taking the initiative, completely relying on mom and dad.
Often, overprotectiveness and total - inadequate - control become the moments that trigger the development of Peter Pan syndrome. Parents strive to do everything for the child, fulfill his whims, do not in any way affect the development of independence. Mom can control every step of her child, not allow the boy to manifest himself in any way, constantly force him to be next to her. Gradually, the so-called atrophy of the will of the child occurs: he becomes pliable, does not want and cannot make even the simplest decisions on his own, it becomes difficult for him to decide on some steps, to develop and improve himself.
A boy who begins to show the features of Peter Pan from childhood, most often always receives exclusively praise from his parents. Mom and Dad idealize their child, even some pranks and offenses on his part are not perceived by the parents as something negative. This approach forms an inadequately high self-esteem in a boy, feeds a tendency to narcissism.
Thanks to this upbringing and similar attitude on the part of the parents, the child faces serious difficulties in the process of socialization. Any kind of communication becomes painful for him. Emotional intelligence, as a rule, is also acutely affected in such children.
In a number of cases, a man with Peter Pan Syndrome has been a domestic child in the past. He could not go to kindergarten, not attend any sections or circles, be homeschooled. Due to the "isolation" from the outside world, the lack of normal communication skills, ignorance of the norms of behavior in society, it becomes more and more difficult for such individuals to make friendships every year. The value of camaraderie and friendship for a male Peter Pan is very low.
Often, in the context of toxic upbringing in the family, boys are faced with the fact that their parents convince them that they should always follow their desires, pursue their own interests exclusively, not sacrifice themselves, and not show even a drop of altruism. Gradually, this influence deforms the personality and character of the child, cultivating in him the features of Peter Pan.
How does Peter Pan syndrome develop and what leads to?
Experts suggest considering this violation of character and personality over the years. Depending on the age, certain manifestations may dominate.
In adolescence, Peter Pan syndrome is acutely manifested by such qualities as total irresponsibility, a tendency to loneliness, serious instability of the emotional background, a desire for risk, and maximalism.
Under the age of 25, Peter Pan syndrome is accompanied by problems at school and work, the inability to build adequate social contacts. As a rule, during this period of time, the symptoms of the syndrome are especially pronounced. The condition can lead to phobic and anxiety disorders, and cause depression with suicidal tendencies. In the same period, men - Peter Pans, especially clearly demonstrate a tendency to affective behavior, hot temper, impulsiveness and aggression. All this can turn into extremely negative consequences, up to and including violation of the law. Young people at this age with a similar syndrome very often become addicted to alcohol, drugs, cigarettes, drugs.
Until the age of 35, there is a period of "calm". Peter Pan is trying to "grow" and mature, to accept his character as he is. As a rule, such men do not seek help from specialists at this age or earlier. They fill their lives with lies, while lying to others and to themselves.
At a later age, Peter Pan syndrome leads either again to severe depression, autophobia in combination with total loneliness, or causes a strong personality regression. Man - Peter Pan is trying to get younger, trying to close his eyes to the dullness and routine of days, making fleeting connections - love and friendship - with people who are much younger than him.
