One of the most painful, painful trials for a person is the death of relatives and friends. It is always difficult to survive, especially if death suddenly overtakes a young man in his prime, and even more so a small child. Here to the grief is added the feeling of a monstrous injustice: yes, everyone is mortal, but why so early! In such cases, relatives and friends often cannot come to terms with the harsh reality, come to their senses. Their grief is so strong that they suffer for many years, sometimes talking to the deceased as if they were alive.
Instructions
Step 1
Yes, it is very difficult for you now. But still try to call on common sense and logic for help. Suggest to yourself: “The irreparable has already happened. Tears and sorrow cannot fix anything. Think about who would be better off if you hopelessly undermine your health or psyche? Certainly not your family and friends. You must pull yourself together, if only for the sake of preserving the memory of the deceased.
Step 2
Very often, such a difficult experience is the result of feelings of guilt. For example, you have offended the deceased in some way or did not pay him due attention or care. Now you constantly remember this, you are tormented by belated repentance, you are tormented by remorse. This is understandable and natural. But again think: even if you really are to blame before the dead, is grief the best means of atonement? There are so many people around who need help. Do something for them, help. Make amends with good deeds. You will find where to apply your strength. This, by the way, will help to distract from painful thoughts, torments.
Step 3
If you are a believing Christian, try to find comfort in religion. Indeed, according to Christian canons, only the body is mortal - a mortal shell, and the soul is immortal. In those cases when you are very hard going through the death of a child, remember the words: "Whom the Lord loves, He calls him early to Himself." And also the fact that the child's soul will surely go to heaven.
Step 4
Pray for the deceased, often bring memorial notes to church. If you feel that you still cannot let him go, be sure to talk to the priest. Feel free to ask all the questions that bother you, for which you want an answer. Even this: "If God is really kind and just, why did this happen?" Often, in order to calm down, you first need to simply speak out.
Step 5
Try to convince yourself with this argument: "He loved me, he would be very sad if he saw how I suffer, suffer." Sometimes it helps. There is another good way - go headlong into work. The more time and effort it takes, the less of it remains for painful thoughts.
