How often do people say not what it really was. Even more often, they do not say what they think. The best friend of a lie is a silence, a half-truth. Lies can be big and small, but harmless childish lies can lead to trouble, and reservations turn into delayed troubles. However, there are tricks that can help you figure out the cheater. Lying is associated with emotional tension, this is manifested in speech, movements, behavior of a person. The less often he lies, the more noticeable they are.
It is necessary
Observation
Instructions
Step 1
Lies have verbal (speech) and non-verbal (external) signs. In speech, it manifests itself as a faceless, schematic narration: a minimum of details, faces, names, common phrases. The liar is afraid to get confused in subtleties and avoids them. The more you are convinced of the truth of what is said, the less reason to believe it. The deceiver builds the narrative, calculates possible dangers, therefore, search pauses between words increase, ragged, unfinished constructions appear. The gaps are filled with words-parasites, interjections. The reaction to your remarks is slowed down (thinking over the answer and predicting the development of the situation). The interlocutor avoids a direct answer, he cannot say a firm "yes" or "no", he shies away or gets bogged down in trifles. An abrupt change of subject is used as a distraction when lies go too far. Try to suddenly change the subject in a conversation with a liar - you will see, he will receive relief.
Step 2
Psychologists identify some figures of speech that betray a lie. When the speaker emphasizes his honesty, he can swear in all known ways ("I swear to health", "I give my hand to cut off", etc.) Avoidance of the answer can usually be identified by the phrases: "I can't remember", "I didn't say that. ", " I do not want to talk about it". Avoidance of a clear "yes" or "no" is carried out with the help of a psychological attack on you: "You said yourself!", "Do you respect me?", "I don’t know what I’m talking about, I didn’t say that", "I don’t have to answer to such questions. " Sometimes the interlocutor may try to gain your trust and identifies himself with you: "You and I are alike", "I have the same problem."
Step 3
Lies also leave outward signs. Since this process is highly emotional, it is reflected in the face and body. The facial expressions change: the deceiver's face turns red (blood rushes to the head), his lips twitch. He looks away, unable to withstand your gaze. However, he can, on the contrary, look at close range. Blinks often, the eyelid twitches, pupils may dilate (from excitement). Answering questions, she narrows her eyes.
Step 4
Usually in conversation, people gesture, but the liar's gestures betray his lie and are signals to you. In conversation, he can touch his ear, rub the bridge of his nose, scratch his eyes. If there are jewelry, sometimes they pull on beads. Excitement increases the need for oxygen, and the person looses the collar, tie. The interlocutor seeks to occupy as little space as possible, shrinks, the posture is forced, hands are glued to the body. Defensive movements are also used: crossed arms and legs (at the ankles), closed palms. The liar constantly fidgets in his chair, cannot find a place for himself, makes many small movements with his legs (swaying, tapping, etc.)
Step 5
“Mr. Body Language” Alan Pease identified 5 main external signals: a running glance, a slight smile that does not leave the face, micro-tension of the facial muscles (the shadow has passed), control of the interlocutor's reaction at the moment of lying, autonomic reactions on the face.
Step 6
Thus, by developing your powers of observation, you can determine if you are being told the truth. But it should be remembered that some signs can be characteristic of a person even when he does not lie - he just is. For example, he has a habit of crossing his legs when sitting or always talking with a smile. Therefore, if you have not studied the interlocutor very well, then you risk falling into the "Brokaw trap". He is named after the famous American TV presenter Tom Brokaw: this is a mistaken acceptance of actions natural for a person as signs of a lie.
