Man is a social being. Many behavioral traits are dictated by public opinion. The desire to be better than is actually dictated by the possible bonuses that society can provide in return.
Worldview as a prerequisite for striving to be better
At birth, a person is pure and completely open to the world around him, people, emotions. The baby does not wear masks: his needs are reflected in his face, in his voice, in every movement.
Gradually, cognizing the world, a person acquires life attitudes, learns the rules of behavior (and in fact: the rules of survival). Asocial personalities - those who reduce contact with others to a minimum - are relatively few among us. Therefore, for most of the world's population, all actions are very closely related to society: its reaction to this or that action. Everyone wants to take their place in society, their niche. To fulfill the significant life role assigned to him: father, friend, colleague, boss, and simply a successful person.
As the famous slogan “Faster! Higher! Stronger - no one likes or honors outsiders. To be one step ahead, to excel, to show off talent - this is what society requires. In return, the person receives praise, recognition of his status as a member of this large family, and, as a result, positive emotions.
It is easier to "seem" than to "be"
It is much easier to "seem" to be someone than to "be" them in reality. For example, in order to seem like a virtuoso musician, it is enough meaningful to listen to the performance of this or that piece of music. Make yourself look happy (or not). In fact, to be a professional musician, you need to have talent. And plus to this, make tremendous efforts, spend a long time to supplement your "talented" base with technical mastery of performance.
Why does the “seem better” mechanism work for many people for a long time? Why isn't exposure happening? The answer is quite simple: many of the components of the image that a person puts on themselves are difficult or impossible to verify. Because it is simply indecent to ask: is it true that from your rich aunt you got a luxurious villa on an exotic island? Or it may be just too lazy to check. Or something else.
When a person feels his impunity, he begins to expand the scope of the image invented by himself. To put it simply: he starts to lie more and more. He gets used to the positive that he gets in return. Over time, the gap between the person who really is, and the one who was invented to appear "in the light" increases. It turns out that a person takes from society what he really does not deserve. The payment for the bonuses received in return is comparatively small - it is just the fear of being exposed. But do not forget that every day the fictional image is overgrown with new fictional facts. And, consequently, the pay also rises - the level of fear rises.
It is quite difficult to grasp the fine line when embellishment of the real facts of the biography develops into an overt or poorly veiled lie. But one thing is for sure: in doing one way or another, you need to be honest with yourself. And just ask the question more often: if I do this now, can I not be tormented by remorse for the rest of my life, and live in harmony with my inner self?
