Divorce is a matter that requires the delicacy and psychological readiness of both partners. There are some steps you can take to avoid psychological trauma.
You broke up and it looks like forever. The following guidelines will help you maintain self-esteem and mental health.
1. Don't take your anger out on yourself. You feel that you no longer have anyone to keep yourself in shape. But, in fact, you have no reason to start taking revenge on your body. “Many people 'heal' their emotions by eating too much, which is a kind of compensation,” says psychologist Eva Mala. Remember that your life does not end in divorce, and in the future you will want to find a new partner. What if your beer belly gets in the way?
2. Give yourself time. If you feel that the best way to heal your divorce wounds is to jump into bed with someone else right away, then you are wrong. After one night's rushed sex, your emotional emptiness will only deepen. “Take your time, allow yourself to recover from the breakup and act with a cool head,” says the psychologist.
3. Don't chase. The worst thing you can do after a divorce is to start stalking your ex. It doesn't matter if it is about physical harassment or spying on the Internet and social media. In any case, remember that you are committing not only an unworthy, but even a criminal offense.
4. Do not tell the first person about it. Even if you may find it unbelievable, most people don't really care much about why, how, or under what circumstances you split up. Don't hang your divorce story on everyone's nose. Nobody is interested in her.
5. Get rid of memories. Stop dusting off souvenirs from joint trips, looking at photos in love from vacation, just get rid of all the shared memories that will only torment you and return to what will never return.
6. Don't waste energy on revenge. Efforts for revenge vilify you. Try to behave in such a way that you are not ashamed to look at yourself in the mirror.
7. Don't isolate yourself. The fact that you are separated does not mean that you should behave like a monastery recluse. “Getting in touch with friends and loved ones can be the best medicine after a relationship breaks up,” says the psychologist.
8. Don't settle for crumbs. Don't settle for the role of supplicant at the feet of your ex. Do not ask, do not try to convince her / him to meet and do not let him / her function on the popular wave of “let's stay friends”. You can afford friendship when you finally come to terms with the divorce.
